The moon looks sad tonight, shrouded,
By the clouds, oblique misery,
It made me wish for the stars to come out
In my world, and for his.
The skies tears were as dry as mine
Unlike the night before last,
When each one hit within the
Same arithmetic beat of our hearts.
Lonely just as that moon is right now,
No light to guide the way for us
Fading as the dawn creeps upon us
With every minute that passes.
We grew old together the moon and I.
We grow old together the moon and I.
Experiencing the world as it is, or as its
Portrayed to us, yet we rise and fall.
Each night I say good morning to him
Every dawn I say my goodnights.
Yet a single word is never spoken
Between the moon and I
Yet our tears fall together, each time
When those oblique clouds cover our sky’s.
Author notes
meh!
Written September 19th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
-
GOOD poem love rhianna x
-
Fantabulous
i am feeling so unfortunate that i cant kiss the hands that made this feelinf - full emotion drunk poem...
your first poem that i just read before this one... impressed me soo much that i couldnt wait to read you more... omg you are a gem poetess.. your poems, atleast the ones that i have read are amazing... well i wil make sure that i read each and every of your write.. 
..
just remember to "smile away the pain"
- HH -
HI natalia, its so good to read your poem. it made me feel as if you and your dear frnd (the moon) cry together and share each others grief.. Well done.. Talia.. Anu
-
Enchanting in alot of ways...
Nicely written
-
wonderfully illustrated poem, the picture has a fairy tale of its own,great flow and formed accordingly,TOUCH OF MYSTICAL
MOMENTS written in this poem..good job ,Linda -
I just love moon poems. This is beautiful.
-
The feeling of this is so nice. It just feels like I should be able to look out my window and see the moon now. Luckily your poem painted a beautiful image for me. Very impressive writing.
-
Excellent
I like it, just take out "the sun and I" in the poem and insert so and so's name and I, and it becomes a personal poem, Keep it up!, this is a great write -
I like it,it's not the normal kind of poems I read but it's good need I say more I think not .
-
You are the sun ... I have to agree with nimbus about working on the last three stanzas. I think you have a really good effort going here. I already love it and I think you are very talented.
-
Awesome!
Awww...soooooooo nice. I hope you are feeling better now. A very nice poem...you know how to use words. Well written.
"Yet a single word is never spoken
Between the moon and I"
This line is like my poem- I am Just a Man.
Good Poem, mate! Good Luck! -
I loved this and I love the moon
so this poem tickled my fantsy
well done well worded and a complete
joy to read, I loved this part the most
as I still grow old with the moon and I.
We grew old together the moon and I.
We grow old together the moon and I.
Experiencing the world as it is, or as its
Portrayed to us, yet we rise and fall.
great creativity in this
Tears
-
This is just stunning! You've outdone yourself Talia. Truly you have. I love the moon as well, so full of light and mystery, such great energy as well. Fanatastically portrayed here my friend. Blessings and Hugs, Gypsy
P.S. I will be back to catch up some day soon (I hope) But will be off line most the day tomorrow. -
Love the expression of the moon being a childhood mate and one that has grown through out your life with you. I always take comfort in watching the moon in the evenings. This is a wonderful poem with lots of expression and nice flow,.
-
This is so melancholy...but then again, you do melancholy well
i like this...made me feel like i was walking dark streets...with only the moon as my company...like a confidante...co-conspirator...friend...
very lovely, nat
UB
-
The moon has always held a certain mystery. I know that might have been diminished slightly in view of Neil Armstrong etc etc, but she does appear to possess magical qualities from where I sit. Keep vials of moonshine in your eyes, tomorrow can only get better...
Me XXX
-
Oh I can so relate to this! The moon and I have a thing
going right now. He makes an excellent messenger.
Great poem from you, as always.
How are you girlie? I haven't seen much of you lately.
Nice to see you penning good stuff.
love ya ~ criss
-
When I think of the moon I think of the movie "Man in the Moon". Ever since I have seen that movie I am reminded of the moon and how it related to love. The moon is such a magical piece of art and it can be used in so many ways when you write. It is unreal how beautiful it is when it is big, orange and round! It reminds me of hope, love and that we all have a chance, one chance at life and that this evening can never be relived! Thanks for the memories!
-
sh*t, this is some seriously good stuff! its a beautiful poem
-
I love this. Eloquently written it is beautiful. Full of expression and imagery. I love love love it.
Tanita -
Till the third stanza you had a very strong poem coming up, after that you gave away the hard work! I think you can rework this adding onto those three stanzas (freshening up/tightening up the rest!)
D -
Awwwwww why you so sad?
Want chocolates?
-
You really captured the imagery in this piece. Awesome flow going and a lot of emotional and depth. Keep it up, you seem very very talented. =]]]]]]
-
Nice job! I liked this piece and the context used ... keep it up dear ...
Take care
~ Steph ~ -
Awww, this has such a sad tone to it
IT is a beautiful comaprison though!
Adding your comment:
1 - 25 of 25
11 old applause
