I still think of you
As I cuddle my pillow
Remembering what was once
So awesome, thinking- maybe again
Although not likely now
I’d stop the world to melt with you
And as cheeky and cliché as it all sounds
Those sounds are loud within my head
And I can’t seem to shut them up
Memories are like photo books
And our pictures won’t fade
They’re gripping me
And I wish I was gripping you
Author notes
Although not likely now
Written September 17th, 2005
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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this applies to tons of breakups. I think I'd feature this for you, but alas, I have no points. I accidentally spent them applauding some of your previous work and tipped it off by giving you 6 more because i couldn't applaud. besides, i know you can use it for spindicated...which reminds me i should get cracking
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haunted by lingering memories. beautiful companion peice to the work "history"
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you should read my lesson on literary devices. the word sound has double meaning. it means to hear in one line and another in the other line
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"I'll stop the world and melt with you" I like that song.
And as cheeky and cliché as it all sounds
Those sounds are loud within my head
I always tried to avoid using the the same words like that in two lines one right after the other, like how you used "sound" twice. But idk, your the creative writing person (hence i read your authors page) I guess thats just something i always tried to steer clear of, and always pointed out in others poems.
But i loved your poem! It was Beautiful!
~Jenn~ -
a rarity? hmmm lol i guess this does detract from what i usually write
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Hey Kryspin,
This poem is awesome. Sad yet sweet, and rather a rarity from you, from what I usually read. Well done, this is lovely. Oh yeah, I've started my column for spindicated at last
tatty bye darling,
Luke
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your still my fav your still the best and i still love you,,, and your for got y=why lol *hugs*
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This is a great write! Your words are really flowing and easy to understand. I really like that you said your thought was cliche, because in some senses it is, but in the same way, it's not at all. Awesome job, keep up the good work, and write more!
<3 Rachael
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