He pulled down the last bit of cloth Malfoy had adorned. The sensation of the wind touching his naked body made him feel that he was sitting amidst magical mist. Slowly, voldemort too start "unrobing".
Malfoy's mind was working strange today. As soon as he unrobed, Malfoy had this urge to pull down the underwear he was still wearing. But he did this deed himself. They were both uncovered, skin to skin....the touch of eternity.
"Well", said He, rubbing his butt along malfoy's. " Let's go".
"Uhm.....are you sure, it's not too early", asked Draco. He was still quite nervous about his first date. Ever since, his breakup with Pansy, he'd been afraid to date anybody. Nevertheless, he put on his robes. He on the other hand, decided not to wear anything.
"Yup!" said He. It's my father's graveyard we are going to.
"Ewwwww", thought Malfoy to himself, but of course, could not say it out aloud. "As you wish, O Dark Lord". What he was seeing was a bit gross, but beautiful in a dark sort of way. He wanted to clutch it, and hold it...
"Come on Draco", said He, ignoring the fire in Malfoy's eyes. "None of that Dark Lord Stuff today. We are going on a date. We'll sit on my father's tombstone, and sip lovely philosopher's pee, and chant spells to lift your robes."
"Yes, O Dark Lord. As you wish."
"You are going to have to hold my butt, as you haven't yet learned to apparate"
"With Pleasure", said Malfoy whose heart was pounding with joy.
"WHAT?!"
"I mean, yes, O Da...."
"Voldy"
"Voldy"
So, Malfoy grabbed HIS DARK BUTT and they apparated to HIS father's graveyard.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH", yelled He .
Well...........the apparition didn't go too well, as Malfoy had obviously Pinched too hard.
They landed up in front of the ministry by mistake, where at least hundred aurors were present.
Voldemort was sentenced to Death and his death eaters were also caught and sentenced to a life term in Azkaban.
Malfoy wiggled out of the whole business by acting like a cute, sweet boy, who didn't know how he had been seen with HIM.
Author notes
I know it's crap! And yeah, all characters are the creation of JK Rowling, and I respect her deeply. This story is not meant for profit, or anything else.
Commented on Harry Potter and Secret of the Mistaken Prophecy by Tyler Drescher
Written September 8th, 2005
A contest entry
- Fandom Erotica Contest by Master Warious.
300 points, ended October 15, 2006, 13 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 34 of 34
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this is hillariouse. Great write. Not very erotic more of a funny weird write. Keep up the amazing work though your very talented.
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that was really funny...
not what i had in mind and i think you should categorize it as "Humor" or "humor and adult" but not "spiritual"
Keep on writing and good luck in the contest. -
I don't know whether to throw up or laugh my ass off.
Perhaps both would be appropriate.
Elizabeth
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Lol Draco and He Who Must Not Be Named as gay lovers? That's messed up. lol. But funny as hell. I wish there were more things out there totally mocking Harry Potter. Though I love the story, the fanaticism around it gets a bit annoying. Lovely, and thanks for entering.
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WOW. What a strange little story. I don't even want to know where you got the idea for this. It really made me laugh though. Would have been even funnier if you put a picutre of a butt or something next to VOldemort's piccy.
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woo!
I This is great ! -
LMAO this was hilarious!
I bet Draco would wiggle his way out too!
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Hee! this made me laugh. Very entertaining. I liked it very much. Thank you for enterting my contest, good luck, and Rock on.
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its kind of confusing..but I love it anyway!
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LMAO! I love it!
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I liked the story itself.. but I could not quite figure out what was going on. I'm so confused....... Well anyway, god job.. and congratulations on winning bronze.
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I thought this was terrible funny, Great job and Good Luck in the contest ~Lady Eclipse
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I HADN'T SEEN THIS BEFORE!!!!!! WHY?????
Cool. Super cool. Just what I was looking for. -
Thanx....it is rubbish, isn't it?
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lmao what the HELL inspired you to write something like this?! Good stuff. Lol. ~ Osarkon
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LOL great! U made me chuckle hehehe
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""Well", said *He.*" Let's go"." should be 'Well,' said *He*, 'let's go.' punctuation wise
" It's my father's graveyard we are going to. " should have quotation marks around it
Interesting thought here, a might bit too short for me. I think a few more details or so and it could be pretty good. Kinda funny, kinda over the top that they'd end up in front of the Ministry with over a hundred aurors present. But to each of their own
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Have never read any of the books but saw one of the movies - quite entertaining. Know none of the above characters, but enjoyed the read nevertheless.
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Not exactly to my taste, the characters were too much out of character for me. But a clever idea and story nonetheless! Good job and good luck!
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this is really weird... i'm not quite sure what was going on here.. but ok.. great write.. i think.. best of luck in the contest!!
xox
Silently screamign -
Very interesting story...kind of short but thats okay. Thank you for entering my conest I wish you luck!
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ROTFLMAO!!!!! Brilliant. HILARIOUS. I love the take you've done with the HP characters. Keep on writing stories. I'm loving it.
Maab -
i can definitely see the humorous element to your story... and I liked the little twists you put in there. Being a serious HP fan myself, I was quite offended that you didn't really develop the plot, but I'll look over this one because of the comic value and the potential success you could have with the story!! My only real nagger would be to paragraph your work more, so that it's easily read, and thus easier on the eyes.
thank youuuuuuuuu -
Oh thatīs EXCELLENT! That had me going... that really had me going... "r" for Rubbish? Are you INSANE? This isnīt rubbish!
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This reads easily, but I'm at a loss to fit characters to this as I've not read the Harry Potter books.
There's conversation and action, doubt and dread. Well contructed, I'm sure this must be something you're proud of, for you suggested it. Keep writing. -
This was very interesting and I found it humorous, I don't know if you meant it to be, I know nothing of Harry Potter, expect that it is a huge rage with some people. I have never read it or saw any of the movies. So I am not sure of who these characters are sapposed to be, but I thought what you wrote was good and had humor. I hope I not off the mark with the humor part and I offend you. Please don't take offense, like I said I don't know nothing of these characters.
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that was very funny!
i enjoyed it reading it! -
LOL!This was good! You surely have a great imagination to pair up Draco and Voldemort,of all the wizards and WITCHES in the world!
It was real fun to read....especially that final line about Malfoy saving himself
Great job Keep writing
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Ola Porchi... isnt ure HP fan sense offended??
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What do you mean..you can't wait till I see it miss??-tht was to adorable yeti who is my cousin..As for this work..it isn't crap thought it is a bit kinda cheap..But still this is a well tried one..I liked the bit when Voldemort turns up before the ministry..lol
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great work!it's kindda nice!it has some really peculiar but great quality to it.good job,man,good job!!
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Thanx for the applause.........this really is rubbish.
It's the worst I've ever done. -
ahem I am leaft speechless... I'm not exactly a HP fan myself... but cant wait till Porchi sees this .. newyas.. ti was fun to read
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Well, since I'm not the greatest Harry Potter fan, I really can't say if it's good or not. But asI've read it, I might as well leave a comment.
And good luck in the contest!
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