When lost and frightened in the night
When tears of sadness blind your sight
Look closely, and you'll see a star
That shines down on you from afar
And when this tiny star you see
All your tears and fright will flee
When loneliness has gained its hold
And you are there with dreams untold
Look closely and you'll see a light
And it will lift your dreams to flight
To let you know you're not alone
Your true love simply yet unknown
When lust for living starts to fade
The glow within you a charade
Look closely, and you'll see a fire
That will ignite flaming desire
And free the passion locked inside
To do the things you never tried
By chance, if these things help you through
Sometime when there's no one but you
Then think of who would give there all
To be there at your beck and call
Look closely, and at last you'll see
That star, that light, that fire, is me
Author notes
Written January 20th, 2003
A contest entry
- Make Me Fall In Love by piccola.
1000 points, ended October 14, 2007, 19 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - G is for... by Pandorea.
700 points, ended August 6, 2008, 7 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - True Love by Samantha Marie.
450 points, ended October 5, 2008, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I'm re-reading things ... just cause. I noticed that in L 11 or in Line 5 of stanza 2, you have used your and it should be you're (the contraction for you are) I assume you meant you are not alone? Ya know I think I'm going senile ... so many of your writes are sounding alike lately but as though I've never read them. It's weird.
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this is a beautiful write, you can do well with rhyme without making it sound corny or cliche, not a feat many poets can accomplish!!! great job and good luck!
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i really loved the third stanza, to wit:
"When lust for living starts to fade
The glow within you a charade
Look closely, and you'll see a fire
That will ignite flaming desire
And free the passion locked inside
To do the things you never tried"
and the ending was really sweet. i do have to say, though, that the background annoyed me. but that's just me. nice poem, overall.
thnkas for entering. -
The rhyme and flow are wonderful. I love the ending and I was almost weeping for happiness by then. Really, really moved by this. Thank you so much. Any woman that recieved such a write would worship you
thanks for this entry.
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This is awesome. I have to admit that I am quite attached to the third stanza. I saw above that somebody else especially likes that one as well. People often forget that it takes TWO to keep those flames of desire afire and when you do... all of life is good. Facing each new day is a little easier and the sun shines a little brighter. Nice work!
(`'•.¸(`'•.¸ ¤ ¸.•'´)¸.•'´)
~~~Touchof1der~~~
(, .•'(¸.•'´ ¤ `'•.¸)`'•.¸) -
Exquisite
Ok, I've only read two of your poems so far, but that's enough to add you to my favorites list. If any of your other works are as good as this one I'm gonna really enjoy reading them. I bow to your artistry. Bob -
This was one of the best poems I have had the chance to read.I think you just made it on my list.You have a wonderful way with words..I am honered to read your work.
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