She moves in enigmatic darkness
Shadows give way to dreams
So intoxicating, she glides...
in and out of my mind
She tastes of ice,
her perfume is truth
Her body is a constellation,
burning in the night
With eyes that outshine Artemis
and lips that are Venus' envy
Her hair turns Isis red with shame
And skin smoother than fair Gwenhyfor
Her neck is elegant
Delicate and divine
Her spine is arched
Serpentine and sensual
With hips that sway
To the silence of eternity
And feet that dance
To the rhythm of earth
The silkiness of her voice
Echoes in the empty halls
Of an unconscious mind
And is coveted by angels
She is neither here nor there
She is a shadow and a soul
Whispering and calling
Screaming and crying
Fading into ancient serenity
The lines of her body are smooth
The color of her character is a pale grey
And the medium of her existence is charcoal
Author notes
Artemis: Greek goddess of Light (among other things)
Venus: Roman goddess of Beauty
Isis: Egyptian goddess of Magic (known for her raven hair)
Gwenhyfor (Guinevere): Welsh goddess of Spring and dawn
A contest entry
- Inspiration by .
300 points, ended October 19, 2005, 7 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - True Love by Samantha Marie.
450 points, ended October 5, 2008, 64 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 20 of 20
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ooo i like it, i love all the similies, metaphors, and allusions, brilliant love~! your wife is a very lucky woman
thanks for entering
and good luck!
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Very nice poem the imagery in this is amazing keep it up .. good luck in the contest. Kelsy
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You have describer her well and we can visualize her as she moves and we can hear her as she talks. A well written poem.
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oh i enjoyed this very well written piece of art crafted with such nice imagary well done
love and light
blaze -
I am often inspired to write about these mythical creatures but you have taken the prize. This is imaginitive, interesting and outstanding!
Dee
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really well written peice, I like the way you describe the charachter it seems like totally black and white in the end but so full of color in the beginning and I think dreams are really very much that way. Good luck to you.
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ASTOUNDING
This is AMAZING!! Your penmanship (?) is fantastic. Must be cool to be so articulate
This must rate as one of the best I have seen since I joined this site. Brilliant work my friend, absolutely astounding! -
This is a very beautiful poem. I love it. the descriptions are beautiful. I love the second and third stanzas. This is absolutly amazing work. GREAT WRITE!!
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Aw shucks...I wasn't sure you were even talkin' about my writing. I'm flattered. Thanks for stopping by. It's always appreciated
- Draven -
Wow. This is outstanding, beautiful and amazing. The descriptions and imagery are absolutely incredible. Keep up the great work!!
One love,
Kitty x -
I am absolutly wowed...ur write is so beautiful it just blows me away. I loved how you used the greek goddesses to make the "dream girl" even more enticing. Gorgeous imagery...thanks for the read!
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Yeah, I'm sure, ya nut...ya surpassed the 'Poet thing' & moved right on up to Scribe very quickly, my Friend...& 'amuse' me??? Hell, Draven...you amaze me!!! 'goddess divine'??? 
Methinks I've moved up a rung or two myself!!! hehehe 
Wanda
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Sustained standing ovation eh? Well...I must be getting better at this poet thing. All these words you're throwin' at me...are you sure you got the right lad?
But thank you from the deepest corners of my heart my beautiful friend and goddess divine. It was my pleasure to amuse you so
- D -
Oh wow...I am flattered by your kindness...Thank you. Oh...and Darragh would like to voice his appreciation as well with a series of gurgles and hand motions....
Thank you again my friend.
- D -
'She moves in enigmatic darkness
Shadows give way to dreams
So intoxicating, she glides...
in and out of my mind
She tastes of ice,
her perfume is truth
Her body is a constellation,
burning in the night...'
'...With hips that sway
To the silence of eternity
And feet that dance
To the rhythm of earth
The silkiness of her voice
Echoes in the empty halls
Of an unconscious mind
And is coveted by angels...'
Sighhh... I swear, Draven...don'tcha ever try to refute the title of Scribe again, dear Sir!!! This is completely & irrevocably exquisite & pure...such elegance & eloquence in these lines you've penned, my Friend...magnificence defined...& Beauty redefined...BRAVO!!! ENCORE!!! SUSTAINED STANDING OVATION!!! HOMAGE...
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With each new penning, both you and your beloved amaze me. A more perfect duo I cannot imagine. Well...except for, perhaps, me and mine.
Most well done, Draven! -
What a amazing dream to have...excellent images. Thank you for entering the contest..
~Kristy
Edited on Aug 31, 10:35 p.m. because '
'.
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that's awsome, keep writing
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Imagery-full!
Draven, this is a wonderfully rich piece of writing! As moonwick said, it has some powerful imagery...so...em...who is this dream girl...hm? Just curious
Her neck is elegant
Delicate and divine
Her spine is arched
Serpentine and sensual
With hips that sway
To the silence of eternity
And feet that dance
To the rhythm of earth
There is something very musical and elequent about those lines. Kristy will be pleased with this.
You've outdone yourself my love...
~Li
Edited on Aug 31, 5:37 p.m. because '...silly little me'.
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Bravo, dear poet! I quite liked this...the comparisons to goddesses from different cultures was a grand idea! But the best part--of course! it's always the best part!--was your imagery. It truly appealed to the senses, and brought my mind to another plane. Excellent work, old chap,keep that talent rolling. Take care and good luck in all you do!
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