When children die, untimely, it’s a shame,
But as a parent, you did the best you could.
You can’t change the past, or even should.
Since YOU bear no hint of guilt or blame,
Don’t berate or castigate yourself -
Life’s too short, time rushes by.
Sometimes we just can’t know the reason why.
Store your regrets on some neglected shelf
In some forgotten closet in your heart.
Keep the good thoughts out to dwell on,
And resolve all of the bad ones gone.
It’s not all that long that you will be apart.
Put aside all of your grief and sorrow -
You’ll meet again on some bright, glad tomorrow.
Author notes
This poem is about how I felt when a friend's baby died. The baby was a preemie and I gather many of them do not live, but it was especially hard on him for several reasons. A female friend of his had also lost her baby just a month or so before, and he had spent a lot of time with her and the baby, as that baby was expected to die. His was not expected to die and he was a basket case for a long time afterward.
Written August 23rd, 2005
A contest entry
- #76 For anyone that's ever lost a child. by daviscth.
550 points, ended May 29, 2008, 16 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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Losing my grandchild is the worse heartache I've ever had to endure. Thank you so much for your beautiful reassuring words.
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It's common for couples to split after the trauma of losing a child, I've heard. I would imagine this is a message that a grieving parent might not be willing to hear while the loss still fresh, but what a comfort it would be when he/she is able to receive it.
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Yes.
Sadly, life throws us curves more often than not. Thanks for reading.
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I know what it is like to lose a child, a part of you goes with that baby and never comes back, I had a miscarriage when I was eighteen, it is truly devastating, I would have probably went crazy too if I seen my baby's body laying there, They would have had to pry me of his/her casket ...
My condolences to your friend and your friend's friend... its a loss like no other, Thank you for writing this... it did good for my heart to read this 
Sara 
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Ooo i love that ending. This is a fantastic write, flows well and your words are wonderful. Such a difficult thing to go through and far too often people try and find words to justify or to make someone feel better and never come up with anything good. You've got something right here that works well, fantastic job. Great write
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I can only imagine how it must feel to lose a child...of any age....the heartbreak, the feelings of guilt, deserved or not, what must feel like a senseless loss of our child.
Your poem is so touching and understanding of the parent's feelings. I know the grieving is necessary for healing, for releasing some of the emotional pain, but as you've expressed here, then we must go on, put aside in some safe place within our hearts, the sadness and pain, and dwell on the love and wonderful times, the good times and bad times, the little remembrances which were a part of what we shared with this this child.
A beautifully expressed and well written poem
Good luck in the contest
Dee
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The loss of a loved one is always extremely hard, some will never know the depth of another persons loss. Each has their own levels some never come out of it...
Nicely written
S~
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I have known grief through the loss of a mate of many years but I have never suffered the loss of a child and I thank God for that. I cannot put myself in this most horrible position as I think it is a hell that is not fathomable.
Your advice is soothing, kind and compassionate. As much as anyone might offer who had not suffered the loss first hand. I think your statements work to remove that guilt and overwhelming self-uncertainty that comes with grief in many cases. -
No, it was the next day, actually. And we knew each other very well, he and I. I knew the woman too, but not as well. However, both of them seemed very pleased with the poem.
And no, you don't have to remove anything.
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The theme is indeed a life-altering event. I have been there. a ray of hope that they will meet again, soothes the reader's grief. Dee
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I totally agree with Legend's words. It's a beautiful SAD write and I am sure you meant well.... but when your friend reads this, he/she will become even more sad. It is so easy to say these things (for people who have not experienced it themselves, only through friends): "Store your regrets on some neglected shelf - In some forgotten closet in your heart", because it does not work that way. It will be a reality for your friend's life till he/she dies. Believe me, I know what I am talking about! But as I said: You mean well... You are compassionate about it, which gives the poem that something extra. Well done J.D. Anna.
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A beautiful yet sad piece,I too have had a friend who has gone through a similar situation, what words can you say that seem adequate.I know not.Death should be for the aged,youth must have the right to life, but sadly that is not the case. Great work most enjoyable yet sad read
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Wow this was really good. It had nice rhymes and these two verses stuck out to me:
"Store your regrets on some neglected shelf
In some forgotten closet in your heart."
I love poetry like that. You have a nice message behind this poem. wish you the best of luck! Good job
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It is of course a sad day when a parent must bury their own child... Many will say they would rather them have died then their child like in the movie Sin City how whats his face says An old man dies a young girl lives... even trade off.. or something like that... But anywys yes I do like this poem and think that it is powerful! You addressed an emotional issue and did it rather well... Good JOB!
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your poem is great advice ... i am not sure about 'its a shame' ... lacks the strength of emotion one might feel in such a loss (although i dont have a substitute to recommend) ..... your outlook, as always, is strong ...and real .... we could never express the pain we feel our friend is feeling; only the pain we feel for them ... you did this admirably ... good luck in the contest >>> GINA
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very personal, I have a soft spot for children, that is I am a parent. Sad. good write
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Yes, parents are not to outlive their children. Very sad when one not ready to be born is, and doesn't survive. You have conveyed these feelings of helping a grieving parent well.
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This is very beautifully written. I found it to be hard to read though because through tears its kind of blurry!! But this is well written and I hope that your friend is alright now. It is hard when you lose a child, it is just not fair that a parent out live the child!!! But your poem is wonderfully done and I think you should show your friend this. It might help...
♥KIKI♥
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