Our hands touched,
Our cheeks blushed,
I grabbed your hand,
You grasped it back,
I held you close,
You held me back,
I sang for you,
You cried for me,
My hand brushed your hair,
You smiled at me.
Trapped in your eyes,
My heart felt complete.
I moved in closer,
As I held you tight,
Our lips touched,
It felt so right,
I looked into to your eyes,
To see if it was,
You smiled at me,
My heart skipped a beat,
I leaned in again,
For a final embrace.
Trapped in your eyes,
My soul felt complete.
I knew this goobye,
Must last a lifetime,
The distance between us,
Seemed vast as the universe,
I knew I shouldn't have,
But I'd fallen for you,
We kissed once again,
Denying the time,
We knew we must leave,
My heart ripped in two.
Trapped in your eyes,
My life felt complete.
Author notes
This is a true poem about my first real kiss. The girl lives in another part of the country than me and it was the most heartbreaking experience I have ever had.
Written August 22nd, 2005
For contest - option 3
A contest entry
- Love is Pain by a Touch of Madness.
300 points, ended September 23, 2006, 81 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Many Options..... Please look by teenagefailure.
375 points, ended January 31, 2007, 73 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Everything deserves a chance, right? by ObliviousReality.
600 points, ended April 8, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - im baaack!!! by nobodys-girl.
500 points, ended April 8, 2007, 22 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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this is so pretty and so sad. to be that far away from some one you care about. good luck and thanks for entering.
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oh how sad
That was beautiful, but terribly sad. Really showed a lot of emotion in it. I like how you kept saying "Trapped in your eyes, My life felt complete." It's a wonderful piece. A lot of raw, honest, and powerful emotion went in to it. Thanx for entering, and good luck!
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Sooooo sad
Im sorry that your friend lived so far away
But thanks for entering my contest
You did a really good job on the poem...
Good luck
E~R~I~N -
Awesome
This one's awesome, like all your stuff. Mind if I ask who it's about? You don't have to tell me,I was just wondering. Good job, good job. I love your work. I'm always so proud to declare you as a friend. -
Lots of emotiong and a smooth flow to it... good work and I hope to see more!
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this poem is a really good read your sadness glows through the poem, at first you are not aware that you would have to leave your partner. but when you announced that yor lover was crying the first thing that popped into my mind was 'why?' but when you read on you definetly find out why. thank you for sharing this poem with me and you have a gift of showing your feelings and making your poetry connect with other people.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
<3 alwayz
Nova -
great poem!! i really liked it
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This is sad but very sweet I liked it,thanks for entering,best of luck.
ShellG.
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Hi Ovel13! This is mostly option number 1 i guess, but i could also be number 3. It was a very romantic moment, but it was very very heartbreaking as well. Anyway, thanks for the oppurtunity!
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very beautifully written. the flow was outstanding and the read was of sadness mixed with the feeling of the excitment and meaningfullness of that moment. you captured that beautifully. nicely done,thanks for entering and good luck!
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Congratulations on winning, a lovely piece of work...
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So beautiful.... i have delt with long distance relationships in different countries, although i have never met them..this truly touched me awesome job! good luck!
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Very, very nice. Smooth flow that almost has the reader humming along. While it carries with it a touch of sorrow, it also portrays the joy of not missing the moment. Very good write, indeed.
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Thanks! This poem really is very personal to me. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
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Ahh this sad. I liked this a lot. It reminds a little bit of how I feel about a break up. This has a lot of emotion. Great write and good luck!
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hahah thanks becca! your so cool! moohahaha!!
~Michael -
ur so cute, the way u comment ppls comments.
this is SUCH a great poem michael!!! you should really keep writing, and updating this thing. i hope to hear more from you soon!
tons of love
-becca- -
Thanks so much for your nice comment!
~Michael -
excellent
this is so sweet keep penning and show ur tallent -
Hey snooky bear, thanks!! I really appreciate it. It was a really romantic, albeit saddening, moment. I'll remember it for the rest of my life most likely. Thanks again!
~Michael -
Thank you so much EchoNChaos2U! I really appreciate your comment!
~Michael -
so cute so romantic
! I love it I felt the same way when I got my first kiss well the true first one! My one that first happened was a dare and I didn't like him,then ended up going out with him a week later! lol!!!
snooky bear~ -
very good
mbckg3... it's a great poem, as your rhythm continuelly flows as thou you were back in that moment
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