Tears they fall and I don’t know why
These moods I’m in just make me cry
The anger, rage, just all comes out
For no other reason I just scream and shout
Fine one minute, the next I’m breaking
I’m tired of putting on these smiles I’m faking
Doesn’t anyone see the pain that I’m in
Why can’t someone save me from within
My world is crumbling, fallen at my feet
While I struggle to keep from accepting defeat
I bottle it up just to appear strong
While deep inside I’ve been weak all along
I can’t keep holding on for a hope of tomorrow
When it just keeps bringing my heart more sorrow
So I sit here crying, pathetic, and a mess
Afraid of showing others the emotions I suppress
Afraid they will judge me, belittle what I feel
So I spend my nights alone, trying to ignore it, trying to deal
I don’t know who I am anymore, thoughts run deep
My bottled emotions form in nightmares as I try to sleep
I wish I could tell someone and bare what I feel
Who’d still be there to accept me and all I’d reveal
So on my own I handle things
negative comments pull at my strings
raw nerves and open cuts
The smallest remark can drive me nuts
In this nightmare I often drown
Every time I have a breakdown
Author notes
today was just a bad day! Every little thing just gets to me now, my emotions are just all over the place
A contest entry
- dark and sad rhyming poems please by nobodys-girl.
425 points, ended April 25, 2007, 66 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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Oh my goodness! this is the best poem i have ever read in my entire life! it's so beautiful! while i was reading it, i was actually crying! thank you so much for making this poem! =,) you have a special talent!
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ok on most poems i was able to copy and past my favorite part in my little message here but to do that i'd basically be copying the entire poem. its amazing. it describes my feeling and emotions so well its freaky. thankyou so very much for entering my contest and best of luck!
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I can relate to the feeling, great job thanks for entering.
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excellent
It is hard to use rhyming couplets in an effective manner without avoiding that sing-song cadence. But I think you avoided that and wrote a very effective poem. -
i love how u wrote this! You used very good words and everything...i truely understant how you feel. This is like im feeling it through you...very deep! keep it up
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I know how you feel lady!
this is written really well, don't be afraid to let out your feelings! -
i know how you feel, as you can see from some of my poems, these emotions are in me a lot.
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Wow, this was definetly deep. I like how you expressed everyone's feelings when they're upset with your use of imagery. I believe we all seem to have so much locked up inside and we try all that we can to hide it from everyone else; Making it seem as if everything's fine, on the outside. Very nice and I loved your rhyming. Well done.
~Nicole
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Wow awesome write GIRL!! I can totally relate to this peice. I was diagnosed with Bi-Poler disorder recently and this poem describes exactly how I feel. All the time. No one understands, I am sick of faking a smile when I feel like I'm dying inside. I have MANY poems written about this! Wow! I loved this. Not to mentioned how easily this flowed right off my tongue. Alot of people caomment about how great this is, but only some can actually feel this cry for help. Outstanding, girl!! Stay strong and no you are not alone...
I am so glad I picked this one of yours to read. I am bookmarking this!!
Edited on Sep 15, 10:53 because ''. -
Brilliant poem, esp the part about negative comments hurting you, like you have an open wound that never heals and any personal attack no matter how small is agony, well done
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the best descriptive poem I've ever read. Hope the depression is gone for you now You are very talented and a wonderful writer
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exellent
This is a very powerful soul serching piece of work!the rhyme had a good flow and followed right the way through, at the same time i thought it was very sad--but could tell that it came straight from the heart---i think you got this over very well, i really liked it! thanks for sharing. mojo xx -
Floody Bantastic!
Woah- I can relate to this more than you know, it's like you snuck into my life for a week! This is scarily familiar. You have managed to describe the feeling of depression perfectly.
"So I sit here crying, pathetic, a mess
Afraid of showing others the emotions I suppress"
These lines are amazing- it send a shiver through me to read this. Anyone who has had no experience of depression will have a good understanding after reading this. Anyone who has experienced depression will find comfort in these words- they'll feel assured that they are not the only ones to go through such madness!
Emotive, great rhyming scheme, excellent use of language with a good structure. Congratulations on a good write and thank you for a fantabulous read- will be bookmarking this one
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Wonderful
WOw this flows so well! it speaks for itself i didnt even have to read it, congrats on a great write
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