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literally translated, missing the melody of the rhyme of the original, sorry...
I'm missing the words, did I forget
The spoken treasures I preserved
So that your memory, in the eternities of time
To weep, to beg, to drink, to sing for thousand years.
I'm missing the words, did I lose
The mystery of the magic word I owned
Allowing me to weave my longing in a long fine thread of silk
Sliding on it long rows of tear beads.
I'm missing the words, am I extinguished
And the temptations of time's dusk caught up with me,
And in turbid thoughts I constantly try to find your charm,
And to hear your voice, and to regard your eyes.
And give me your hand, and wipe my tear,
Call my name, let me sleep in your lap.
Author notes
my Romanian is very good, and this poem is rhyming in its original form; translating it so that it preserves the "melody" would take weeks, sorry about the simple literal translation (in order to preserve the correct fonts, i placed it as a picture, lol)
Written August 2nd, 2005
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"I'm missing the words, did I lose
The mystery of the magic word I owned
Allowing me to weave my longing in a long fine thread of silk
Sliding on it long rows of tear beads."
Exquisite...profound...magical...Like Nicolette, I wish I could read it in your original language...I'm quite sure it's beautiful, as is it's "shadow", my Friend. 
Wanda
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what a significant piece of somber while missing one you still love and long for, I liked it in both languages although I only speak English of course. Is romainian like french of sort?
who is now in charge of the AP chap book? It was once Jaden as I was published long ago....
Tamara
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thank you tamara for visiting such a difficult one to relate to, and for still feeling pleased with it. yes, romanian is "some kind" of french/italian (belonging to the latin languages family).
have no idea about the ap chap book, what is it?
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dear diana, well - i left Romania as a kid and didn't really use the language for some 40 years, so i am happy of your language remarks. and thank you for your honest opinion. you are right about my syllable count (and btw - i am perfect at it) however sometimes i play with it. here i made two rows one count and two roes another count and the last stanza, again different. why? because even more than syllables count I "listen" to my poems and i will sacrifice accuracy for the sake of my ear (and it does not have to be another one's ear). as for contents - well, many times i leave question marks hanging, part of the way i write (and here, lol, i was missing sufficient words as well
. thanks again for the comment.
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dear nicolette, it is always a pleasure to lose to you . i had no real win ambitions here, since translating rhyme is almost impossible (and i can write in my weaker languages only in rhyme, lol, the vocabulary needed is more limited). thanks a lot for your congratulations and congratulations on your gold my friend.
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Hmmm. I must admit that your Romanian is great, I couldn't tell you're a foreigner. And although I love English and hope my English is... like your Romanian , now talking about the poem. Your rhyming scheme was good, indeed, but there was something a bit strange to it, like... I don't know. Sometimes the syllable count wasn't exact, but don't mind me, I'm not good at rhythm. As for the images... they are beautiful indeed, but I feel you're missing from the poem. I mean even if there are metaphors, imagery and so on, it's like something that could be said by more people. I don't know. I feel you are very talented but you need to... make your poems more personalized or something like that. Again, my humble opinion.
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Congratulations on the trophy, Joe! I wish I could read and understand Romanian, but the Engish version is just as beautiful and carries your distinct touch of beauty and excellence. I actually meant to read your entries in this contest, but never got to it...well, here I am and as always I am charmed at the grace and beauty that slip from your pen!
~ Nicolette
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You will always know my comment dear friend
Edited on Aug 07, 7:45 because 'typo'. -
you keep me smiling here... BIG... thanks my friend
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Ooh, I like this just as much! Your poetry is great, and for some reason it makes it ten times more beautiful with the diff language first and then translated afterwards. Aahhh...
♥ Jen
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