she was simple
she was alone
she had no place to go
and no one to turn to
she was lost
she had given up
all hope of finding
her way out
she was confused
she did not know way
she was where she is
she was frustrated
because she could not find
anyone to love her
she was just a little girl
lost in this great big world
with no one to love her
so she was lost
for only simple she was
Author notes
Written July 30th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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This is a great write. Awesome job! Reach for the stars and never stop writting.
**Shanna** -
great wright
Dark is the perfect word great write -
This was a dark write. Very simple (lol) but it was in a twisted way. I was expecting a different kind of ending, but yours was much better. Great job and you did an amazing job writing it. I didn't mind the lack of punctuation, it seemed like you were too alone and tired to care...made the overall mood of the poem better in my opinion. Like I said, amazing job and I'm glad I got the chance to read it.
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Well, I understand this one, I don't think myself a simpleton, lol. But I got the message without any re reading. I think that the flow in this was pretty good, but I don't like to much how you reused the word "she" so much, it kind of took away the "simple" beauty of the poem. But anywayz, all in all, good poem, keep up the good work.
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Not too long, which is good. Your punctuation is something that needs to be discussed, however I will not be the one discussing it. You conveyed feelings of lonelyness well. Well done.
1 - 5 of 5




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