I am a soldier
But a special kind
I'm fighting a war
That will never be in the history books
Or be given a purple heart
For the injuries I've received
I am not a solider of honor
But of shame
Of pain
I am a solider of self destruction
I'm fighting a war against myself
My skin; the battlefield
A razor; my weapon
My body is covered in battles
Won or lost - I can't decide
I'm not sure what side I'm on
Some days, I'm fighting for peace
Some days, for total destruction
I was drafted into this war
And I can't run away
Author notes
I'm not sure if I like the ending or not. I keep changing it, and I'm just never fully happy with it. Any suggestions?
Written July 26th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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First off I think the ending is perfect. This an amazing poem. I love how you express yourself through words with such grace and beauty. I really admire your talent and adore your poems. K
I am not a solider of honor
But of shame
Of pain
Truly brilliant!!
-Lindsay -
their right.....this is damn fuckin good of a poem.....i mean wow....i read it 5 times in a row.....wow....you took war into a whole different subject field that i'd have never thought of thinking about.....i liked it......but.....a soldier fights for something they belive in.....more as in the common good for people that they care for.......some battles lost some won.....but ya gotta just fuckin shove your flag right up the bad guys ass.......that sould do the trick....lol...much love....stay free
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I think you might have but thats ok. And thats really why I said it, you can ask plenty of ppl I always say that and those who have talked trust me and know that the only thing I am trying to do is help.
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I can't remember if I've already replied to you or not. So if I have, sorry, if not, thankx. But be careful, if you tell me you're willing to listen, I just might talk.
~Sam~ -
the ending is fine. you have nothing to worry about in my opinion. this is great and I dont really ahve anything else to say about it.
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I like it soo much, and the theme is a very serious one!! It's really hard going through that kinda stuff...Comparing hurting yourself to war was good, that's what I liked about the poem. What I think could be better though is, you could have described more accurately what you feel before and after cutting yourself. You know, the urge you feel before to feel pain...and then the relief and feeling better and stuff. Readers need to relate to WHY you're cutting yourself. Other than that it was a great write.
~Baby Princess -
"My body is covered in battles
Won or lost - I can't decide"
I don't want you to change anything about this!! This is so original..I hope to see more by you soon!
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Well... the theme is very cliched, but the way you showed it was new and original. I sort of enjoyed the drafting comment, it went well with the idea, and sort of put yourself beyond yourself, if that makes sense.
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This was a really good write You have shown a different sid eto this issue
Maybe you could end it
I am a casulty of this war
and it's so hard to get away
just a suggestion.
It's a hard thing to deal with and wish you all the best
Mia
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That is an amazing poem. Its just great. It is a tough subject to speak of, but the poem is really good. But if you need anyone to talk to baout all this I am always here. And I hope things get better.
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I don't like the last few lines, either. I just couldn't figure out how to end it.
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Wow. Intense. I love the internal rhyme. The last line kind of irked me though, it seems too simple.
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this is one of the most brilliant things i have read in a long time. I know how hard this subject is to write about...and i thank you for writintg this..i applaud you
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A difficult subject to write about but you handle it well. Nicely written, and although the subject matter is hard relate too it was still a good read.
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