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Sound of Freedom

As the pounding
of heavy hoof,
awakened my madness
to the
mortars calling

Crawling inside
my enemies,
my parasitic ridden
mind,
starving

Hungry for any
emotion
of life,
for death rises
before
the dawn

I shut my eyes,
but the pounding
hooves never
die.

Author notes


Written July 22nd, 2005

In a list

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Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • vaseline
    April 10, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I shut my eyes,
    but the pounding
    hooves never
    die.

    This killed the rest of the poem and made it look like crap (its not) i'm just saying your ending is spectacular.

    Thanks


  • Amunet Wolfbane Moderators member
    July 26, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    OUTSTANDING! Short and deep. This one is enough to leave an imager of nightmares lingering. Bravo! Blessings, Gypsy


  • My Nemesis
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I think you have captured the emotions behind the pictures very well. Well written, I like how you use every day words (not words that I need a dictionary to understand) in your poems. Great job.

  • reaper of chaos
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    good

    Good write. It's definately interesting. I like the 3rd stanza the most because it shows instinct to need emotions. anyways god write keep it up.

  • shereejay
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    The poem was written well, I enjoyed it,"crawling inside me enemies"wouldn't that be nice to think like the devil?


  • Watuwant silver member
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    pound pound pound pound. Yes, I hear them too, sometimes, those hooves demanding my attention. Well done, Muddy! Kind of reminds me of my dark, moody days.
    peace
    doug


  • July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Closing by return. What a lovely way to write a poem. so many poets forget this tool, or have trouble using it, that it is almost like a dream to see it. It makes the poem much mroe unified. Thank you for sharing your work with us.


  • thricelightning
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    "Hungry for any
    emotion
    of life,
    for death rises
    before
    the dawn"
    This is very well written and i think that was my favorite part!
    Kepp writting!
    Blessie!


  • Lyrical Soul silver member
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is very well written Muddy. After I finished reading, the pounding of the hooves remainded in my mind. Well done and good luck in the contest.

    ~Lyrical


  • Anthony-
    July 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    The style of this piece really works for it as your words slip and slide throughout it. Well done to create such a piece for this contest and for yourself. Tony.


  • Redstormy gold member
    July 22, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Oh Muddy I love this.. I can relate on some level as well. Especially during my sleepless night. Awesome write my friend and very mysterious. Good luck with the contest.

    Red

1 - 11 of 11