take it away
i don't care if i see it again
just a small time ago i felt free with a pen
but now i feel jammed
like a gat that's been shot off too much
...now i never get that true rush
so i'm thinkin'...
what is my identity
it's got me dumbfounded 'cause i can't make a remedy
am i christian?
i'm not sure if i'm ready for commitment
even though our gaps are less distant
seems like that lil' tug is missin'
i wish the Lord would beg me to come with him
but it hasn't happened - so i'm wishin'
it's different, to be put in this place of confusion
with truth being clouded
from judgements intrusion
i stopped abusin
but history acts as a bruise when
people take my past faults and use them
just to define me
and in angst, i find myself ranting
quickly panting
and outside - stamping
inside message - has meaning in the stain
i find myself dreaming out the pain
it's insane
how in this self-battle lithium's been slain
but maybe i can resurrect
...or even better yet
go straight to heaven
where in God's eyes i can work from a peasent
and become a legend
...i hope that this whole thing is pleasant
Author notes
hm...
Written July 8th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Just take a breath! Make sure that you move one second at a time, for our time and God's time is not the same time.
You have found you, and the newness thereof is frightening to say the least! Don't let anyone throw that past life in your face, no one, I repeat NO ONE has walked in your shoes, that's why we all have didfferent feet. Besides, when we ask God to fogive us He throws all those old deeds into the 'Sea of Forgetfulness'. Now the people who throw BS in your face have no jurisdiction over your destiny or fate. They have have no good measure for you, it seems. Don't let God go little brother, let them go. Why would someone remind you of past ill deeds. Sounds like a need to put you down to me. But then I have had to let some go whom I never thought I would so, that I could have less confusion in my life.
"Test the spirit". God will show you who you need in your life. You are new to all this, step back, let it flow, like the words of your poem do.
I LOVE YOU,
Your Big Sis
Renee
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aw, Georgie, this was really, well, poetic is the only word I can think of (cuz I know you don't like beautiful). your flow was really really good, and I think I'm still just a bit shocked seeing you write on this subject. This was just awesome
.
-whit
Lots of love
. You got me to talk to if you get down.
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great!!!!!!!!
Very good Georgie! Look like you went through a lot while writing this. I hope everything turns out good for you.
I'm always free to talk to yah!
XoXoXoXoXoXo
xxxCourtneyxxx
yah always!
-
This is a question I think we have all asked ourselves at some point in time...*sighs*
I have came to the conclusion that sometimes we do those harmful things in a twisty way of rebellion/semblance of control. By going against what we feel is expected gives us a sort of false power. It does take a lot of commitment...but also to urself... hope this made sense anywhos cuz ur not alone in ur struggles...
Take care
-♥ G -
great
this is a very interesting write, I've questioned christianty many time before, and found it not right for me. I hope you find what your searching for. -
Georgie's getting called!!!! Hit me up if you got any questions! PEACE! -B
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Interesting. Write on.
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i really loved this except for the very last line. .....
your emotions seem to be very raw hun . if you ever need to talk send me an email beeboo_tiggs2@hotmail.com
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I know it's a difficult place you're in right now; but it won't be that way forever. You said: "...it's different, to be put in this place of confusion with truth being clouded from judgements intrusion..." Those lines will make for some great future discussion!
It's never easy to walk away from things that have become "habit;" even when we know it's what's best. And even more difficult to reach out for what will be our salvation; usually just 'cause we can't "see;" we don't really know what's out there. Even though it may feel uncomfortable right now, you're in a good place; just don't stand still. Keep moving toward "the light." It'll always guide you out! (For what it's worth....I don't see this work as coming from one whose "jammed." You've spilled out your emotions and thoughts quite well! This is a great write!)
Paula -
This is beautiful hun,And sad,You put so much in here, You seem to be on the right path to me, I wish you all the best always babe
Love ya hun
always
~ vini ~ -
fantastic,honest
it takes alot of time,to get right with the Lord. it seems you are on a personal level realizing,as i did,that there is much more to life,something better out there,to believe in.now God is giving you a choice,and he is accepting you as is,and no doubt,he is calling you back to him. it may take time,but you will get there. as i read your words,i notice a wonderful change in you,and i see you following a new,and great path. just keep looking towards the light,and never look back. this was a great write,my brudder. janis
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