My sands are white, my coast is warm, and yet I wait for her
Her hull is light, her payload borne, Oh, that she’d caress my shore!
I watch with secret longing for her measured, queenly grace,
And wait, my heart aflutter, for the day we both embrace
But she already has a captain, and while he’s at her helm
There’s little chance that we will meet outside of the dream realm
My soul is torn a little when she docks on alien sands
I know it’s not her desire, but what her captain demands.
Yet still each time I feel a spike of raging jealousy
Why should these total strangers get such close proximity?
And why can’t I, if they can? What can be so wrong with me?
I’ll just wait, and let the tide keep time, a servant to the sea.
Oh, for the day she idles in the quay
When captain and crew are all away.
I dream we’ll meet, and love, and say
“We two are one, the ship and bay.”
Author notes
This is not open to criticism, It's just thoughts and feelings, so that all I would like to hear from you- your thoughts and feelings on it.
I'm not interested in 'making this better' or more suitable for other people.
Written July 7th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I thought this was terrific! I'm adding you to my favorites! I'm a rhyme person, and this was very enjoyable.
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This is so sweet and beautiful. It was a joy to read.
I long to write like you one day, and wish I knew what to say about this excellent piece of work. Words fail me, and that doesn't happen very often. Congratulations on a superb poem! -
I want you to know that I only had one other poem on my bookmark list. Now I have two. This was very lucid and poetic at the same time. Wendell Berry talks about poetry being a force that once tapped into major themes and interpreted them for others, helping their insight. I think you just did that here and made it look so simple. Almost all males will or have experienced exactly what you laid forth. It certainly brought back memories for me. And I loved the author's comments. Way to be sure of yourself.
Edited on Aug 09, 9:35 p.m. because ''. -
If anything has run aground, Captial, it is the shores relationship with the ship.
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good write!
no criticism, just my thought (as requested) It seemed to be more of an ode from the bay rather than the shore...the ship does not usually reach shore, unless it runs aground. But with that "feeling" expressed, I did like this poem, very original in its idea (that is if anything is original anymore).
And I actually enjoyed the rhyme scheme!
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