I remember Albert sat in his favourite fireside chair.
I'd huddle down beside him and in his memories share.
I'd watch the flames a-flickering as the coal burnt in the grate.
Hearing all the voices in the tales that he'd relate.
About the many mementoes kept in his old sea chest.
I never tired of any though there was one I liked the best.
It was about a little bottle that once held Navy rum.
But it was the present contents that always struck me dumb.
An old time wooden trawler with all its sails full set.
A pretty little model and one I could not forget.
Albert told me of a mermaid caught up in the trawlers net.
And of a cruel captain who chained her like a pet.
Of how Albert thought that evil. Something just not right.
And how he dropped her overboard on a dog watch one dark night.
Now before the mermaid vanished she stopped a while to say.
"A souvenir I'll give you to remind you of this day."
Picking up some flotsam she shaped it with her mind.
Into the image of the trawler she soon would leave behind.
And then singing oh so softly she made that model shrink.
And placed it in the bottle that once held Albert's drink.
I still have Albert's bottle. It is my pride and joy.
And it is a fine memento of when I was a boy.
Author notes
Written July 2nd, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Mermaids # 2 (Invitation Only) by Crystal Chanda Lear.
300 points, ended July 14, 2006, 1 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - PICTURE PROMPT by Xx Scarlet Dove xX.
300 points, ended February 18, 8 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 15 of 15
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What a write!!! This story is so believable, and flows so well. It just forms a moving picture in my mind with your imagery. Your writing is simply awesome. Thanks Jim, and bless you.
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This was written at the time of the International Festival of the Sea in 2005 where I was fortunate enough to be invited to perform Shanties alongside the tall ships at Portsmouth. Hence the nautical setting to my tale. But Albert was real enough and a big part of my youth.
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This is amazing! Wonderful story! Great form. Well done.
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Thank you for reading and writing. It is nice that my earlier stuff is still readable.
Jim
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Pure sacharine. All my poems are lo-cal.
Jim -
this is really sweet....:]
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That is the type of effect I hoped for when I started out thinking of Albert. The rest just seemed to follow. Glad you liked it. Hope we cross pens again sometime.
Jim
PS How was it at the zoo? -
Dear Jim, I enjoyed this. Not just because it is beautifully told and a touching story, the sort you really want to be true, but because it took me back to my childhood and the reading of all those wonderful tales by Enid Blyton etc. Congratulations to you too for your trophy, which you also deserve! Liz
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Thanks for your kind words and loud applause. This was written whilst attending a maritime festival and relaxing whilst off-watch.
Jim -
excellent
A very fine and well-crafted tale which was a pleasure to read.
Best of luck in the contest.
David Michaels -
Hi Quill,
Sorry I missed this comment yesterday when we were knocking things about. Yes I miss those chats with Albert especially as I get closer to the age he was then and realise such things are slipping away.
Thanks for reading and writing.
Jim S -
Thanks for your comment Anemone.
I'm afraid it's all fiction after the first two lines. Albert was an old neighbour. I was 10 he was 80 or thereabouts and I belive he was an ex-miner. I do remember the fire because in our house it was electric and you can't see pictures in an electric fire.
Jim S -
Thanks for your kind words. I'm glad it reached its target.
As for The San demetrio I shall certainly have a look at that soon.
Jim S -
I like the sing song nature of this. The story it tells, and the fact it causes the reader to think of a story s/he has heard before, and if there were any items to go along with the story. Great write.
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This is a very fine poem! I shall add it to my collection of treasures. My uncle was also an old sea-dog (ran away to sea at 14 on sailing ship, round Horn with Bucko Mate on first voyage, ship, "Carrabin" torpedoed off Ireland - World War I. He ended as Master Mariner, also gave me ship in bottle, one of my chief treasures.
I fear it doesn't rhyme, but if you'e got time for a LOOOONNG pome you might like my "The 'San Demetrio'" posted here, and possibly "Redhead with Phosphorus" which is shorter. Anyway, congratulations and thank you for this fine poem.
I feel (if you don't mind me saying so - I AM half Australian) you are an instantly recognisable kindred spirit, grumpy old man and all!
Applause!
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