My body cries out for sleep.
My mind says," There is just one more thing to do.
One more minute and we're through..."
Two hours later...
My body inpatently cries,"Are you done?
I think I see the sun!"
My mind looks up and says,"Hmmm...? Our homework is almost done. One more minute please..."
My tired body snarls,"Thats it! I've had enough. You've denied it long enough, sleep must come!"
My mind whispered,"But I'm afraid of dreaming."
My body softly whispered back,"I'm sorry sleep must come, close your eyes. Perhaps tonight you will not dream."
My mind whispered back,"I hope your right."
Author notes
I have trouble sleeping some times.
Written June 20th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Great write amethystdawn! I love the style and the type of measured you used. I love poem when they possess 3 S. sense, sound and sensation. Your is an example, for instant: the line
My body inpatently cries,"Are you done?
I think I see the sun!"
Can you feel or sense how impatently cries would be if it is not been explained of having seen the sun. Great work ! -
Thanks for reading my poem. I'm glad you liked it.
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I totally know the feeling of not being able to sleep and not wanting to sleep...great piece! and I'm glad I could make you laugh with my "Stupid Comp" lol
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Thank you for the generous praise.
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I like that one too - and I can relate to it! It can be so hard to settle down sometimes, so you keep going and going until you really can't anymore...just to avoid the dreams and thoughts that will come once you are not distracted. I liked the rhymes as well - generally a great write!
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this was great. i loved ti so much, there was one error thoguh, i twas the last line, i think what you ment to say was "My mind whispered back, "I hopre your right." you just forgot to put the word mind in there, but this poem was really good, i know what thats like. great write once agian
Blessed Be
Kim
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