Your fingertips
Trace lazy circles
Breasts swell
Knees weaken
Lips quiver…
I ache for you.
Patricia Gibson-Williams
June 17, 2005
Author notes
Written June 17th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Third group of winners for 'Scott Adelmann blend' contest by DefinitiveFreak.
300 points, ended June 22, 2005, 1 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Thank you very much. Your response made me smile, I was thinking about how many of my friends and I have discussed some of the men we've known who made "a strange attempt at stroking somewhere." A long as they eventually manage to find the spot that works for you it's just fine, but when you get one who insists that this has worked for every other woman hes known so you should just bare with him until it starts working for you, thats when you have to run the other way. Patti
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So simple, short and true. The image of lazy circles made me think of my boyfriend. When he wants some, he just sorta pokes me with a lazy finger, or makes a strange attempt at stroking me somewhere. I really liked this, thank you for writing this for my contest.
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Very intense...for such a short verse! I enjoyed it though...right through the post-sex smoke...Peace, Kelly
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Sometimes I find most of the best work is done when its kept simple and short. You have done a great job expressing your desire here. Nice work!
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Short but sweet, and reall well thought of.
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I loved the first two lines, really descriptive even though it was so short and simple, but very powerful still. This is the kind of poem you remember after you've read it, so well done
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wow ! so small a poem and yet so intense!
loved it dear
goodluck in the contest
you have used such simple words and are able to present the earthyness of th aching of desire
brilliant, if nothing more
keep writing
luv -
Yes that's how it feels like. And then you come. And then you fall asleep and that's it for another few days. Ah well.
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this is beautifully written and even though so few words it says alot with emotion good luck in the contest
love and light
blaze -
A very short but to the point poem! You can feel love in the words. I enjoyed reading this. Keep up the great work! Good luck in the contest!
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=D A lot of emotion in a poem so short. The bosom heaving... weakening of knees... I've heard of those before, but thanks for introducing me to "lips quivering", it's really good, I've just never heard of it before. Great write.
-Miji
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