We all know that Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
And then then he had a very great fall.
This is nothing really new at all.
But what is not nearly so widely known
Is why the silly fat fucker fell down;
Edna knows and will tell you now.
He was clinically obese through
Having eaten too much junk food
Stuffing his eggy gob with fatty poo.
Humpty was of course a role model for many
Think of Tweedledum and Tweedledee
Another couple of English fat freaks.
But now Britain has lost its leading edge
In the obesity stakes to the good old USA
And the poor make do with the fucking crumbs.
Sorry I got bored with rhyming part way through but that's how the cookie crumbles.
Author notes
Three million children will die in the poorest countries of sub-Saharan Africa alone in the next ten years as a result of the global community failing to meet its promises of slashing death rates, the UN revealed in a Jul 2005 report. Enjoy your burgers, folks, be like Humpty. Burp for freedom's bell.
After finishing your snack of 200 biscuits, go to www.allpoetry.com/poem/1306347 .
Written June 8th, 2005
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Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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Even with your rudeness, you do know how to put the finger on the spot. It's a disgusting feature of western society and will take its revenge. we'll destroy ourselves, eiter by fallen of that wall or in another, even more pathetic way
Fun to read, though with a harsh truth behind it.
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lol You've said it so well. Americans are the most obese people in the world. America is the fattest country in the world, I believe. Sad, but true. And although you've done it with humor, you've made an extremely valid point with this poem. Gotta give you props for that.
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Something like 20% of English people are obese! I think the USA figure is 25/26%. Don't you see the horrific lumps walking round? Or should I say waddling?
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um, fat english freaks? excuse me, but england rockz, i speak from living here for 9 years of my life, and the other 3 in Norway, but england rocks.....good poem tho!
XXKALXX -
You need to put which poem you commented on in your authors comments box or else I will not see that you commented and therefore DQ you.
~RoberT -
I commented on your other poem, I didn't follow the link number and I didn't realize you had two, oh well, they're both pretty awesome. This one was so funny. I can't find anything wrong with it except that you didn't finish the rhyme but had you not said "Sorry, I got bored with it" I probably would not have noticed, good stuff.
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I still say he was pushed... O.J did it!
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Ouch! You hurt my fat ass feelings! hahaha
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thanks for entering
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WOW!what an amzing piece.....i'm really impressed by your talent to convey such a powerful message in a humorous poem!it's kinda satire
i really liked your rhyme scheme.....it was dead funny! i especially loved the lines :
But now Britain has lost its leading edge
In the obesity stakes to the good old USA
And the poor make do with the fucking crumbs.
well done!hope to read more such wonderful works of yours.....till then,happy writing
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maybe thats why he fell off the wall? fat little fuck was trying to catch the cookie crumbles before they hit the dirt?
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ha ha, I love it, espesh how you got bored halfway through with the rhyming and thought "fuck it"!
I now have two items with Humpty in, the one that inspired you for this (and I am honoured) and my bible contradiction one, I think Im getting obsessed with the dumpty.
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ahahahahahahahahahahaha that was so funny I really enjoyed it. prolly should have ryhmed all the way to the end though.
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This is good. Simple and to the point. Very well written. One thing thats always bothered me about Humpty Dumpty, though, is that no where in the nursery rhyme does it say he's an egg... and yet we all assume he is... I smell a coverup, but thats just me and I'm paranoid. Very nice piece. Never stop writing, you're talented.
Aurelia Finn -
Good
I feel like I was left hanging on the humpty dumpty backgraound...what up with that? But I do get your point. But still...grrrrrrr! -
There was no knocking of the UN, merely reporting fact! The US gives less per capita towards the 3rd world than any other country. The UN is helpless.
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O.o Well, Europe is more crowded than we are. Perhaps they can't afford to cram their supermarkets with so much food. Or Americans really are pigs. No one really knows... interesting metaphor though... Humpty Dumpty... :B Nursery rhymes are "so" cool.
Keep writing, Miji -
Hi just thought I would invite you to dinner so here is the menue. grilled hamburgers, oven non fat fries, wacking great salad , strawberries with one teaspoon of cream, wine of course, liquers, irish coffee to finish the hamburgers are home made, sod the calories, have fun , Di
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a bit mean to the people that are obsese but i liked the message that was expressed in this poem. and i liked how you used humpty dumpty as the whole theme of the poem to express it.
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hmm this has a powerful message, although i think the execution needs some work. I would have liked to see the humpty story developped further as you leave the reader hanging and trying to fill in gaps that don't exist. I also feel that the stab you take at the UN in your author's notes would be more effective if it were placed in your poem itself towards the end.
you've got the base now let's build a model car we can drive to BK and get a burger
best o' luck with that -
::gnawing on a greasy chicken leg:: >BRAP< You tell 'em sweetie. ::swigs beer:: Fuckin' proletariat
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