long ago, on a day with snow,
I had to go and pee.
I walked away from where I'd play
so no one there would see.
I walked uphill, kept on untill
my footstepts were all I heard,
then unzipped my pants and sighed relief
as my name the snow conferred.
I realized, as I trudged back home,
that something was'nt right
The car oustide said I wasnt alone
cause my parents park inside.
When I walked inside, I wanted to hide,
for there in front of me,
were my parents, right beside
a cop, all three angry.
I caught their stares, and unaware
of what it was I'd done,
I glimpsed at the floor, the distance to the door,
but before I gathered the courage to run-
"now look right here" said the armed cavalier
"you best come look outside"
And took me to the squadcar
which I earlier had eyed.
he said to me "what do you see?"
it WAS NOT an entreaty,
he commanded me, decree, not plea,
and I looked to find...grafitti?!
no wait, its words, and they were faint,
but then it all was clear.
I pee'd my name on his windshield
thats how he found me here.
My name was bold,
the snow was cold,
and apparently, it stuck.
so yes, my friend,
in the end,
it turned out I was
....in trouble.
for not only my name had he in proof,
but also other hints
for example, stained upon my pants,
were large yellow imprints.
so a word of caution to you, my friend,
learned much to my chagrin-
if you ever have to to take a piss,
MAKE SURE YOU DON'T DOWNWIND!
Author notes
when i lived in new york, i did dumb things daily.
Written June 7th, 2005
A contest entry
- The Stupidest Thing You by knots untangled.
350 points, ended June 19, 2005, 8 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
LMAO
Omg thats funny, you def did it good...
-
At first I was confused but then I understood and saw it, think again when you next pee!!
-
hehe, you made me giggle, boys entertain me a lot, because you don't always look before you pee in public.
-Bridget -
ah very boyish, not to be sexist, but a girl never does that sort of thing. besides, this is a humorous stupid thing you've done, and i'd say peeing on a cop car, is definite stupidity; in a good way.
-Meg -
LOVE very funny and very guy like!!love it
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