there is a rose
with petals thick
velvet pink
the greenest stick
such a prize
in many eyes
but when it rains
the rose, it cries
it does not feel
that it is right
so this rose droops
in sight of night
there is a girl
with brunette hair
that shimmers
and produces glare
with big brown eyes
that light the skies
but when it rains
this girl, she cries
she has a loss
of self esteem
her life is
just a scary dream
inside her mirror
all she sees
is ugliness
it makes her freeze
i only wish that
she could see
how much she truly means to me
because she is
that perfect rose
and through her sadness
beauty shows
i love her from
her head to toes
i don't know why
she does not know...
Author notes
...
Written May 22nd, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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hey sexii nice poem
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Too Good for Words
Beautiful...just beautiful -
Poignant
Metaphors...my fav
Interesting choice too.
It does suck and get exasperating at times when we can't get through to someone. Esp under those circumstances...
"inside her mirror
all she sees
is ugliness
it makes her freeze
i only wish that
she could see
how much she truly means to me"
It was as if I could feel ur helplessness when all u can do is stand by. Another spiff write
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This is by far the sweetest poem I have ever read, It has a beautiful effect, Gave me warm chills, I got completly lost in your words. Hard thing for people to accomplish. Wonderful write, Yeah guess I'm a sappy girl, Sucker for love.
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Lith, that's a side of you I ain't never seen. That was a nice write man. I hope you showed her this! I'm pissed. I mow cemetaries for a living, and it's raining. This just made me happier--it reminded me of me lady! lol. Well, anyway, this is a really great write, showing the deeper side of the smoke screen that is lithium.
Peace. -
yo nice write son this is fuckin sweet lol Ihope things are going good for you I miss talkin toyou and Ihope that you give me a message one day soon and I can chat with you again things are going good here for me life is finally getting better you know what i mean still smokin lol well ill hit you up later.
Kimpossible
p3@ce out in a fattie!
lateums
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good job!!!
wow lith,this is really fantastic and very wonderful. i really enjoyed reading this,you have a beautiful soul,and it shines through your poetic after-thoughts!! great job,keep it up,janny wubs you!! nbf/poetic janis/dark janny 
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God, you're wonderful.
Makes me cry.
Why do you go and do that? -
I didn't know a disease could be perfect and everlasting.. i suppose that in a biological sense that a virus could be the perfect life form however its definitely not going to be quite as pleasant as love can be. Regardless of the sciences behind love, this poem was definitely worth reading. I'm not going to play Dr. Phil and try to give you advice or anything just so long as you keep writing poetry like this.
The language you used was very simple, which adds to the simplicity of the poem and maybe the simplicity of love if you think of it in that way. If you'd like this poem to make more of an impact, maybe you could try substituting some words for better ones? just a thought. All in all still a fantastic write.
Nicholas -
Love, my friend, is a disease. It can be perfect and everlasting one minute, no signs of symptoms, but in the next instance. It can be terminal, and cause death of self and emotion. Be careful when treading into it, yet be happy to have it as well.
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TOO BEAUTIFUL!
Oh George......This truly took my breath away! (And there's no question that if she could see it, it would have the same effect on her!) You amaze me; how is it possible that someone that can unleash such anger and fury in his work also produce something as delicately beautiful as this piece that is pure perfection? (Natural talent, and ability, no doubt!) This is just too beautiful, George! A poem that not only touches the heart, but that will linger in the memory, as well! Beautiful work, sweets!
Paula -
man this is beautiful..this girl is lucky to know u thats for sure...and funny thing..my name is also alicia and im a brunette with big brown eyes as well..thats awsum...maybe she could be my "around the world twin" lol great poem
~Sheko -
This is beautiful Georgie! Why don't you show her the poem, I mean, girls can't resist poetry. If she thinks she'll get away from you, she has her work cut out for her. You are the sweetest guy, and she'd be lucky to have you. Good luck in love
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aww...this is that girl you told me about?
This is adorable georgie..
What are you waiting for...?
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