He licks his dry, parched lips,
moans softly --
his mind wanders.
He calls, "Mother!"
He hears a moan somewhere out there
in the swirling, blowing sandstorm.
Another soldier, calling "Mother!"
in another language.
Again, he cries, "Mother!"
Again, the other cries "Mother!"
It matters little that they do it in different languages.
Somehow, the medley of Arabic and English
weaves its own spell,
mesmerizing both of them.
Soon, they grow silent --
Only an occasional moan drifts through
the keening wind.
Sand begins to pile across their quiescent bodies.
Far away, two women wake --
Dreaming of two strong, young sons.
They each pray --
in different languages --
to the same God.
Author notes
This is a poem written during the initial attack on Bagdad when there was a terrible sandstorm that stopped the advancing Americans in their tracks. The poem is about an American soldier who gets separated from the rest in the storm and meets an Iraqi soldier who has also been separated from his comrades and, by extension, it's about their mothers. It's a "what if" poem.
My "best" poems are rhymed, and nearly all my poems have been published, so this is literally the "best" unpublished free verse poem I have.
Written May 13th, 2005
A contest entry
- Free Verse Frenzy (Prewites Only) by poetryality.
925 points, ended November 3, 2008, 51 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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It seems that religion, as I personally view it, is a separatist’s tool. The same God, different names, names, as any other language usages. I could go off on a tangent over the content of this work, and the rationale it makes my heart and mind but I won't. I will simply express the fact that I over-stand your sentiments and appreciate your use of symbolism and metaphor.
Thank you for this intelligently written entry in my contest. I wish you the best in the contest.
Much Love & Respect ♥
Renee
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wow great job i really liked this it was really good..
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wow, your a very good poet! I really liked this!!!
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great write. Excellant imagery. great job capturing ur image and relaying from ur mind to pen and down to paper. one of my favorites ive rea.
keep wriiting.
adam -
Beautifully written.
I fully agree with your poem.
I have written a poem
'Turn off the TV set'
just before the start of the war.
Inviting you to read that.
All well wishes.
~shaitus. -
This has always been my take on religion. I think we all call him different names, but he is the same being. I think he must just shake his head in disgust at our world.
Thank you for writing it so eloquently and poignantly.
M -
ok
this is a good poem it shows that when u get down to it were al just human beings. keep up the good work -
Thank you for directing me to this. It's a very touching piece of poetry. I'm sure many mothers wake in the night thinking they've heard their sons calls. In a perfect world, we would not need worry about that
Ruth -
Wow, Ecrivain..this is so true..we all belive in God..I do call him Allah..you do call him God didn't tell us to kill each other..it is very touching poem..I know where the inspiration coming from..great write..one of a kind..
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Nice piece
Nice piece. Funny how the basics get lost in the politics of war, which somehow manage to manipulate the minds of grown folks who should know better that killing for isms is acceptable. Wouldn't it be great if everybody could just live and let live? -
GREAT!!!!
LOVELY work!!! really good choice of words for such a subject. this poem has a smooth n effortless flow too loved the lines :
Far away, two women wake --
Dreaming of two strong, young sons.
They each pray --
in different languages --
to the same God.
once again,great job! captured everything perfectly!!!
Edited on May 14, 2:04 because ''. -
damn good!
Quite good! I don't usually come across poetry that is as successful as this. There are also very, very few flaws. Well done! -
Great write that shows us once again that all people are the same the just look at things in a different light. It are the mothers that suffer their sons so far away on the battle field praying in their own language to come save home someday.
Two sons one arabic pray to Allah, the other name him God both believe in a God that never order to kill in his name, but was telling about love, peace and forgiveness. It shows once again the madness of war. A war that never have winners only knows lossers in the end
herman -
A tear provoking reading in a few succinct wo
This needs no words, only framing to hang on the wall. Such is the way of war. Such is the way of mothers and their children.
May God bless you. -
Wow! A story that could be told from a many journey of lonely paining hearts. this captures the piece "Far away, two women wake --
Dreaming of two strong, young sons.
They each pray --
in different languages --
to the same God."
ICU -
I am at zero points (literally) and cannot applaud, but I'm coming back.
Thank you for acknowledging this and sharing it. -
Yes...! We are all connected to the same source...and all disconnected from the same source...
This mother will pray for those mothers who's arms are aching, and for those who's hearts are crying to return to their mother.
Thanks for inviting me into this...Peace, Kelly -
I remember hearing of a Japanese soldier and an american soldier in a similar incident after the war.
This is a devastingly beautiful poem, as always, with you. Is the cry of one mother worth another's? Well done, friend! -
Believe it or not, I was watching CNN and the sandstorm in the very first days of the invasion. It occurred to me that it would be very easy for a soldier on either side to get lost, and what would happen if they met and started shooting at each other, but couldn't see well enough to do much. I'm afraid that's all it was originally.
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Wow, now I really like this one. The idea of two enemies sharing the same thoughts, both feeling a little scared in their current predicament. I think this poem reminds us all that no matter what side we may be on, that when everything is stripped away we are all human who have mother at home praying for their safety. Well done here, I am bookmarking this.
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Believe it or not, I was watching CNN and the sandstorm in the very first days of the invasion. It occurred to me that it would be very easy for a soldier on either side to get lost, and what would happen if they met and started shooting at each other, but couldn't see well enough to do much. I'm afraid that's all it was originally.
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This was great. Captured everything perfect
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oooh very sad.... beautiful and definetly moving. i'd like to know what inspired this? was it personal? there's a feeling of familiarity about it but not like i've seen it before. this is excellent.
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absolute excelence
This was great. Sad but bloody briliant. I can't wait to see more of your writes please, keep it up.
Artemis C -
Very deep and moving. Quite a different take on this subject. I was beginning to think I had heard enough about what was going on in that conflict, but this reminded me that I guess I haven't. It is very interesting to see things through another's eyes. I think you accomplished something to that affect here.
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Interesting point
I can see this and stories like this has been told before from all the wars. A really fine point of view and what if. -
Interesting and kind of sad. Like the flow and the style. Your title gave me a completely different idea of what it was about, but when I read it I got it. Good write.
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