Sitting I watch myself
The agony tears me apart
I put of a great show
But I never open my heart
Locked inside myself
Tormented by my scars
Looking at my life now
Wondering how I got this far
One more hit
One more drink
This isn’t the girl I am
This is not how I think
Am I so far gone
That I m not thinking straight
Will I stop and catch myself
Before its too late
*I CAN stop
I WONT give in*
There’s got to be a way
That I can win
I tell myself no
Say it’s not worth my time
Over come my fears
That are all in my mind
Stand my ground again
Tell my self Im strong
Confess to iniquity
Know that I was wrong
I know that I’m strong
And I’m gonna heal some day
Dear Lord just hear me
When I kneel down to pray
My only way to happiness
My only way to live
Is to live my life for you
And my life I freely give
*Lord help me to remember
How strong my faith once was
I stretch out my hands
And tilt my face above*
Author notes
I'm tired of being torn, I know that to live again without all this pain, without the things I have been using to sleep, I know what I have to do. Give it all up, and start living for God again.
Written May 12th, 2005
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That is truly one of your best poems, and i hope that you are doing what you write. I hope that you are good, and i am sorry for all the things that are wrong in your life. And trust me when i say i know how it feels to want things back the good ol' way. Miss you..love ya cuz!
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