Trying to Find it

i wish i could better express
things i deeply feel inside
I show my feelings so vividly
And yet i constantly hide
I want to find a happy medium
Where insanity and happiness collide
I wish i could be in a place
where time was on my side
Maybe i was never meant to be happy
But rather to only be content
I just wish i could figure out why I'm here
And why i was sent
I sometimes feel so out of place
I just want to go home
I wish i could erase this misplaced feeling
Of always being alone
I guess i was never meant
To find romance in juvinality
But rather find my own place
Of belonging and serenity
I know no one can tell me
How to become a true image of me
But i also know it's not impossible
To set myself free
so I'll keep searching for the key
To unlock the secret garden
And after i find myself i can experience true love
But not before then