I had forgotten the sweet scent of your skin,
not being near enough
to detect it floating around you.
I forgot how it made me
Feel protected because you were there.
I had forgotten how cheerful it made me feel
To tease you,
Because I hadn’t been close enough to speak to you
How your mischievous smile
and giggle,
gave me butterflies.
I had forgotten the twinkle in your eyes
When you told stories
about the many men in your life
because I hadn’t been near enough to hear them.
I forgot how it made me feel content
because you were happy.
I know that I will always be in love with you
And that you can never return that love.
But I still find your presence invigorating.
Author notes
This is about the same person, but as you can see it's much different. Tell me what you think.
Written May 5th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Awesome
Wow. I've felt that way before. Knowing someone and not having that love return. Your very good. Keep Writing. -
excellent
Excellent poem of love and understanding. I found it so honest and you captured the feelings of loss. Well done.
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this is really wonderful. The structure is just long enough to not feel repeptitive as each stanza remains original frum the last. This is a gripping piece, and it builds nicely as you read it. Great ending, and just elegantly and carefully written all the way through. Very nice.
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That was beautiful... Even though it was about your love for someone, I kinda heard the echoes of my previous girlfriends voices in certain lines.... Take care.
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Great write
I liked how you described the person here Keep writing, this was a beautiful poem about missing someone Thanks for your comment
All the best,
Thanks for your comment
Pozo
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Excellent flow of words. Your poem gives a sense of feeling.
Sad though realistic. Very nice poem ,well written. -
thats pretty awesome!! I like it and i think im gonna go read some more of your work right now!!
~Ash~ -
You write with such detail and meaning, I love everything about this. I know how hard this is and I admire you for forming your feelings into something beautiful for others to read. Take care
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I think it is absolutly great! I like it a lot and yes I totally understand the way you feel. Nice job!
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This pertains to a current situation that I am in almost EXACTLY! It's amazing -- I love this piece. Great write!
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"I forgot how cheerful it made me feel
To tease you,
Because I hadn’t been close enough to speak to you
How your mischievous smile
and giggle,
gave me butterflies."
I love that stanza. I can completely relate. Teasing is so much fun and it can be such a good way to relate to that person. Always having something you can fall back on that you remember as being special with them. Excellent write
Edited on Jun 09, 12:00 because ''. -
i think its awesome!!! i could hell relate to a lot of these things...but i could never express them....well done in getting that done!! i love the thing about skin...so true
thanks for sharing
great write
Libb*
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