i heard the news,
i heard it well
my choices hardened
my life's now hell
When she came
the news she bore
but he let me have it
and now I'm tore
The look on my face
the shock to my heart
i fell to my knees
my head fell apart
i wept tears of sorrow
i lied on the ground
i fainted right there
and made not a sound
when i came awake
you spoke not a word
but the tears in your eyes
told me what occur
why you did this to me
i will never know
but you cheated on me
and now you must go.
Author notes
Written May 3rd, 2005
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Comments
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good write. i can see how this is an internal conflict. your thoughts all messed up after that moment you find out. this was a good write. i liked your rhyme though the second stanza didnt really make sense. you had a few case errors but not bad. your flow of the poem worked out really well though. you lead on thing into the next. your last stanza was great. it really summed up the poem and stated the cause for your misery. good job with this. always keep writing *kat~~~
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