"a bad stand"

A Bad Stand

In jail thinking of how I’ve come to this place.
I tell you a story of a vicious cycle and grace.

 

A father and son both got life.
Not because they robbed a bank.
Not because they killed their wife.

 

Some may call it taking a stand.
Others may call you a man.

 

He was only 30 years old,
When another man ever so bold.

 

It started out with a poker game.
One refused to pay up, the other started calling him names.

 

The spectators roared "I KNOW YOU NOT GON’T TAKE THAT!!"
If he only had, if only he could turn time back.

Pride stood tall, anger rose from down deep.
He threw the first punch, his wife began to weep.

 

Before you knew it, a fight broke out.
The people began to run for safety and shout.
Dare he step to me that way!
Another blow, he never saw another day.

Self defense was not the sentence, you see,
When you’re this color, it’s only murder in the first degree.
No matter how many witnesses cried self defense.
He threw the first punch, life was his sentence.

 

One last look at his son and his wife.
As a free man, he would not see them again until paradise.
He received the Lord in his heart.
Behind bars he died, but from God he did not depart.

 

Here I am, this I can’t believe.
After what happened to my dad, I stand in the same need.
I need the judge & jury to see.
I didn’t mean to kill him, I was only protecting my family.

He flirted boldly with my wife you see.
Even after he saw she was with me.

My wife ignored him and got in the car.
Could I do the same? Not by far.
Hey brother!! I asked for a little respect.
He cursed me in front of my wife.  I was really upset.
"Come on baby" I heard her sweet voice say.
Oh how I wished I had listened to her that day.

I glanced around and saw people coming out of the store.
My wife, my son looking at me and many more.
Instead of getting in the car I decided to stand.
Before I knew it, I had blood on my hand.

Pride stood tall, anger rose from down deep.
I threw the first punch, my wife began to weep.

It was then I thought of my father, my wife and son.
But it was too late - the damage was already done.
Life was my sentence with possibility of parole.
To make that parole would become my ultimate goal.
I had something my father didn’t.
A chance of parole, the thoughts alone had me smitten.

Thinking of how we got in this place.
The spirit of pride and anger,
father after father, we ran the same race.

God this is awful - please change our course.
The life he took, the life I took, I began to sob with remorse.
A vicious cycle it seemed to be.
I wanted to change my son’s destiny.
When my son and his family come to see me
I often remind him of the family legacy and tragic destiny.
Remember, remember when it happens son.
Your grandfather, where I am now and how it all begun.
All of the reasons I thought were good enough to fight.
Means absolutely nothing now,
as I hear the screams and cries in the night.
Out there I was tough, big and bad.
In here it took Jesus to keep me from going mad.
Amongst the captive, within He has set me free.
Now I preach the Gospel and share my testimony.



The visits are shorter and shorter it seems.
Pondering on the things my father told me and what it all means.

Driving down a narrow street trying to park in a space.
Along came my neighbor and parked in front of my place.
I yelled, you know early this morning I shelved that spot for me.
So what, my brother, the parking space was free.
Man you know we park there every day.
Man shut up, find another spot and get the hell out my way!
Hey babe, looks like there’s another spot up the street, my wife said.
All of a sudden I thought about my father and granddad.

To stay away from foolish pride and anger is my ultimate goal.
Only one month later, my dad made parole.

The joy I have in seeing my wife and son freely everyday,
Makes a bad stand easy to just walk away.

By Inga L. Johnson
a/k/a Poetlady777

 

( A special thanks to you for reading my extremely long poem). God Bless You!!