If I could be a movie star
Up there on stage or screen
I would be called a Lochinvar
A master of the scene.
If my name everybody knew
Up there on Broadway lights
My dimples and these eyes of blue
Would whet some appetites.
The girls would ooh and ahhh and sigh
Whenever I came walking by
And strain their necks so they could see
A simple little glimpse of me.
I'd hear them giggle
Watch them wiggle
Hoping they could catch my eye
Then tell their friends about the day
A movie star came walking by.
If I could be a movie star
My time would be well-spent.
I'd champion some causes
Like the world's environment
And, since I'd played a cowboy
Or detective in some show
Though I can't tell you how, boy
They would think I really know!
When I walked into restaurants
Or any of my favorite haunts
You can be sure the maitre d'
Would see that they took care of me
And all would stare
As I sat there
Nibbling on my caviar
Then tell their friends about the day
They had lunch with a movie star.
If I could be a movie star
It wouldn't be all laughs.
My hands would ache from signing
Fourteen million autographs
And, if I signed, it was ok
But, brother, woe is me
If I declined, they'd mutter
"What a stuck-up S.O.B.!!"
Some men would get defensive while
Their wives or girls threw me a smile
And they would feel lesser than
A handsome, big-time actor man
So fists would fly
And punch my eye
Or cut my cheek and leave a scar
Then tell their friends about the day
They punched out some big movie star!
If I took out some hotsy-totsy
Chick to some affair
I'd see the evil paparazzi
Camaras everywhere
See headlines blurt
The latest dirt even when it's clean
And see my picture plastered on
Some rag-tag magazine.
Conclusion is now very clear.
The cons outweigh the pros, I fear.
I'd love the glamour and applause
But I can sense too many flaws.
I'm not cut out to be a Lochinvar.
Though I'm sure I could do it well
That life for me would be pure hell.
On second thought
I'm glad I'm not
A famous movie star!
Author notes
Written April 23rd, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 29 of 29
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Oh, I hear you!! These days I wonder why anyone would want to be a movie star, years ago they were treated with respect, but now its fair game.
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So am I, I would hate the attention I would get when there are people that deserve it more that don't get it. Thank you for your unique view of things and not being afriad to speak your mind no matter what others think.
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Oh Balladeer, oh Balladeer. I think you did it again! Wonderful write, man! I loved it... and you got me laughing so hard I couldn't see... I think a tear escaped somewhere in there! If anyone could've pulled it off, it is definitely you! Excellent, Magnificent, Stupendous, hehe.
I think you deserve more than that, especially since you gave me your honest input... which is more than I can say for most people here! LOL Thank you, Balladeer.
~
*DJ* ~
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Talked yourself right out of it ey?
Yeah, it is nice to dream about those things but I'm like you, in reality it would probably really really suck. A pure and funny write sir 
Well done, as always.
~Lyrical
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Lol... I'm reading lots of 'be grateful for what/who you are' today, Mike... this one is especially entertaining, even with it's laughs, it carries a wonderful message.
Love it
I sure wish I vould come up with stuff as good as this ...well I used to live not too far from a male strip joint in Seattle and there was so much whoopin' and hollerin' goin' on there when I drove by, maybe I could have gotten inspired if I'd had the nerve to stop in ...although it might not have been poetic inspiration I'd get....lol. They were all Chippendale wanna be's, so, well... maybe it wouldn't have been a bad idea to try.... all in the name of poetry, you understand.
A funny, funny piece
Dee
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BEAUTIFULL!!!!! I loved it!! Perfect!! Keep up the good work!
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It's good and funny creativity
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awesome! loved it cuz you got the truth out there! bravo, darling!
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Very well done! This is a pretty funny little write. You manage to keep our rhyme scheme very tight, but at the same time you tell a coherent and entertaining story. Great job!!!!
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grand
dude. nice write! keep it up! -
"Some men would get defensive while
Their wives or girls threw me a smile"
I know you're going for a rhyme here, but when you read this line out loud, "while" just doesn't make sense grammatically.
Good concept. -
8/10
Very true! -
The title just jumped out at me. I wouldve loved to have seen you do something really out of the blue with this title. It would be great to see where else you could take a title like this. Good work for sticking with what the title expects this to be about. The poem flows well.
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this was different and refreshing! the subtle humor throughout was spot on
even the rhyme was smooth.
i'd say good job! -
This put a smile on my face it was very light and made for a very enjoyable read. It was certainly a very interesting and well written read.
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absolutley fabulous!! interesting and gigglesome loved every word!! thanks for sharing!
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Interesting read well done
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nice touch
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Nice Job
Replace movie with rock star and im 100% behind this poem. Somethin i, and alot of people, can def relate to...keep it up -
Excellent
Well, this was very interesting to read. I liked the rhyming scheme, and your choice of words you used. I'd have to agree, I wouldn't want to be a movie star either. That was great! -
What a very interesting story and told as if you have already lived it
OK...fess up! Who are you really! I know you are a celebrity to know so much about their lives.
Well Done Poet! Know matter who you are, glad you have chosen these wondrous halls to grace with your presence.
Lily ~* -
Wow its such a lovely poem... I'm glad it was featured for you or I could never have read this. It's so light and interesting... keep up the good work!
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very different. interesting. i cant imagine how they live the lives they do. im sure i could not do it. good job with this. enjoyed the read.
Blu -
this is one that that to be honest had a chance at being much better then what it was..Soppy in some areas as well..good style though but could have been more.
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Fun!
Those baby blues don't need a Lochinvar to make them twinkle! I think you do just fine, and your poem certainly catches the cliches and hoopla of a screen star's life. With your creative talent, though, you might have made a very good actor! I'm happy to see a new post, too! And your special brand of humor.
Karen -
But you are a star Mike and you shine so brightly way above the other men. Such a winning smile and attitude of gratitude will bowl the beauties over just as quickly.
This is cute. I love your creative spirit and dare I say... it's about doggone time you penned something new mister!
♥ Kimberly -
oops! Just saw that...thanks, good sir!
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You may not be a movie star, Michael, but you are a shining star on Allpoetry! You always come full circle, always with a lesson in the end, and this is just another of your masterpieces. You are brilliant. Bravo, maestro.
becky -
You have a typo in line 6, ol' buddy.
(Beyond that, this is damn near flawless.)_
Adding your comment:
1 - 29 of 29
10 old applause
