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Observe

Lightening rips across the sky. Brilliant hues of purple and gold illuminate the horizon.
Wind singing my name to the rhythm of the rain....
Who needs a club?

Author notes

Just had a late night thunder storm inspired thought ;O) I might come back and build on it at some point. Any idea's?
Written April 22nd, 2005

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • grannyeri gold member
    January 24, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    Liked the thoughts you have expresed in these lines - would look more like a poem if written one line below the other, rather than like a paragraph in prose. Very visual - can hear and see the wind and rain through your words.

  • metamorphosis73
    April 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for the input. I think I agree. Sometimes a simple thought is poetic enough ;O)

  • vertigo beat
    April 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    by the way...i love it the way it is...i wouldn't add more...it leaves the reader to think and it also creates imagery (its powerful like this)...
    Edited on Apr 24, 5:55 p.m. because ''.

  • vertigo beat
    April 23, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    WOW...you' re right...who the hell needs a club?...the rhytums there, the maginificent lights are there, natures there...it makes a person think, and its definitely a wondeful poem...I loved it....short but sweet...KEEP WRITING!!!!!!!!
    ALwayz there
    ~^~Pure~^~
    Edited on Apr 24, 5:48 p.m. because ''.