Falling down into the mysteries and the personal cinema of troubled sleep
Past the elongated mystic willow trees and their insistence to cry and weep
To the rock bottom of the primeval, forgotten and the very strange land
Along with Alpha waves beating off a surreal rocky and desolate strand
Where the mermaids and the secrets do sing
And the contractions of the uterus do bring
Back to the garden of Eden, in the beginning
The white operation theatres and the conche bells ringing
And the buzz and the waves, go through your petty life
Contrasting with negativity and the ultimate conflict of strife
And the examination of the spark, presented and of the giving
Was a compliment to the actual noble act of the forgiving
Your dream it did contradict with the understanding of the divine word
Where images are muddled and meanings are absurd
Are all our religions based on dreams?
Rem's in the eyelid of a universal, expanding, playground of the schemes?
Where is the dividing line between dreams and reality?
Where is the dividing line between madness and pure sanity?
Who holds the triumph and the divine card?
Past the minstrels and the ramblings of the devilish bard?
The black hole it did spew and regurgitate
The conflict of Love and the conflict of Hate.
Georges.
Author notes
This poem represents a conflict inside all of us that can manifest as mental illness. Written April 22nd, 2005. Author Georges.
In a list
A contest entry
- Options/Titles......of Doom! by vampireblood.
415 points, ended February 23, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ♥♥♥ Lots of Options, Lots of Types of Poetry, Lots of Stuff For You!♥♥♥ by xxRainbowDawnxx.
400 points, ended March 3, 2007, 63 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Enter Your Best Prewrite by xxRainbowDawnxx.
300 points, ended February 25, 2007, 105 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - But we flew to far away from Neverland... by Dawliah.
600 points, ended March 1, 2007, 28 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Conflicts: Good versus Evil by Stonecosta.
530 points, ended May 2, 2007, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Bat out of Hell.......Dark or love poetry welcome here!! by Dreams27.
1050 points, ended June 16, 2007, 11 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Open! Open!! Read this!! haha by Dark Angel Reborn.
390 points, ended July 20, 2007, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make Me Love You [show me your best] by thelovesongwriter.
800 points, ended July 29, 2007, 73 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The very best you have (ROUND 1) by Xgeekdreamgonewrong.
340 points, ended August 12, 2007, 86 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - LET ME HAVE YOUR BEST!!! by Ale E.
600 points, ended August 15, 2007, 65 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Anything by Nam.
900 points, ended August 25, 2007, 97 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - ~Tons Of Options~ Come Inside~ by BeautifulNitemare.
450 points, ended October 23, 2007, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Dark~Like~Me by Dak.
550 points, ended January 24, 2008, 44 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
-
Beautiful bibliocal reference and startingly imagery. Thank you for entering this interesting poem into my contest.
-
This just my style! I like it! I thought you used great words and descriptiveness in this write.
"Rem's in the eyelid of a universal, expanding, playground of the schemes?
Where is the dividing line between dreams and reality?
Where is the dividing line between madness and pure sanity?
Who holds the triumph and the divine card?
Past the minstrels and the ramblings of the devilish bard?
The black hole it did spew and regurgitate
The conflict of Love and the conflict of Hate."
That has got to be my favorite part! Great job!
-
Ooh. wickedly sinister.
pleasurably chilling.
yup. this is a winner.
very descriptive && well-written.
the message portrayed and the imagery work hand in hand.
lovely write.
Peace && Blesses
~Rain -
Very good indeed. Very nice imagery. You got my attention. Thank you for entering. I wish you the best of luck in my contest.


-
This is good. I liked how descriptive it was and how deep it was...but i felt my mind wonder in some spots of the poem. I liked it...but it didnt caputure my attention like i think it could...Good write though, and thanks for entering
-
thanks for entering this!! this is an excellent piece..very well written!! i really enjoyed reading as this was wonderfully penned! thank you again for entering..i wish you luck in the contest! take care, sam (dreams27) xx


-
Cooool! I know it's a prewrite, but I still gotta say that this is a really unique PoV that I didn't ever imagine would find it's way into my contest. The metaphors are amazing, and the imagery is superb. I read it and got all kinds of crazy thoughts, and then it all made sense when I got to the author's notes. Good job!
-
This is a very lovely piece, I enjoyed it. Great job. Thanks for entering and good luck to you in my contest.
~~~Vampireblood~~~ -
Somewhat of a thought provoking write. I like that. When words are written that really make me stop and think, I know they were words worth reading.
I can't even pin point at what point I would deem the best lines, they all flow so well together. Great job
Thanks for the entry
Autumn -
Lovely poem, thanx for entering!
-
The questions you ask are impossible to answer, and I think that's why I loved the poem so much. The ryhming makes it eerily honest, and the way it is worded makes it sound like a marching cadence and love song at the same time. My favorite part it:
"Where is the dividing line between dreams and reality?
Where is the dividing line between madness and pure sanity?
Who holds the triumph and the divine card?
Past the minstrels and the ramblings of the devilish bard?
The black hole it did spew and regurgitate
The conflict of Love and the conflict of Hate."
There are no dividing lines. Only the artificail ones we humans in our arrogance put up to make ourselves untouchable. Your poem really explored life, and I loved reading it.
-Rothanna
-
this was really amazing you are good I think this is a winner best of luck...
peace,
junebug -
thank you for comenting on my poem i thought this was very cleaver it was very different as well i have not had an entry like this in any of my contests it was very original i liked it alot................lots of luck and lots of love
always and forever
-theartzgrl~*~
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -
It was interesting i liked it it was good keep it up and thanks for entering my contest
-
Awesome
Very excellently written! This poem is so wonderful; the imagery is fantastic and the flow of the words is amazing as well. My favorite lines were:
Where is the dividing line between dreams and reality?
Where is the dividing line between madness and pure sanity?
I thought that the questions were awesome and surely impossible to answer! Great, great job! -
as always, you manage to blow me away with your words. great job!
-
I have no words
Where is the dividing line between dreams and reality?
Where is the dividing line between madness and pure sanity?
Who holds the triumph and the divine card?
Past the minstrels and the ramblings of the devilish bard?
I can't stop thinking about this poem. I know you heard this before but this is the best i read this week. I hope you can write more stuff like this and don't stop. Wherever there's an internet connection there are chances for us to read one of your workart
The black hole it did spew and regurgitate
The conflict of Love and the conflict of Hate. -
I had a small problem with the rhyme scheme. The first three lines rhyme, and through the rest of the poem it's two lines of rhyme. This might be some form of poetry that I'm too stupid to know about, but I found it really distracting, and for me it disrupted the rythem. Other than that a valiant effort.
-
the ending was particularily gripping. u used a lot of terms but they all fit. :-)
-
That was a really good peom, i wish i could writew that well!
-
Wow
This is brilliant! It left me thinking certain things that i would never have thought about before.. All the questins you asked are well put and would require a well thought answer. I must say i have grown to liking your work so much. Good luck in the contest
Best wishes
katy
-
this is a very powerful write that should really leave every reader thinking....Although I can not say i have experienced mental illness first hand I think all have the same turmoil brewing at times just the same. The lines I felt were extremely powerful were:
Your dream it did contradict with the understanding of the divine word
Where images are muddled and meanings are absurd
Are all our religions based on dreams?
Rem's in the eyelid of a universal, expanding, playground of the schemes?
Where is the dividing line between dreams and reality?
Where is the dividing line between madness and pure sanity?
Who holds the triumph and the divine card?
I love when poetry asks questions to the reader...leaves them to ponder and really look for an answer. Great job on this write many applause to you on this brillant write...and good luck in the contest
-Amy
-
Your dream it did contradict with the understanding of the divine word
Where images are muddled and meanings are absurd
Are all our religions based on dreams?
Wow, the whole thing was really, really amazing but those lines especially stuck out to me. The piece has so much depth, you can pull endless thoughts from it. Really looking forward to more from you, and again, amazing work. -
very nicely done. it's not tacky like a lot of the love/hate poetry they have here... i was getting so annoyed with those. great job on this. x)
-
one more thing. You need to write a book. You have a great talent and I feel honored that you share it with all of us.
-
This is eloquent, full of vivid imagery, and wrought with emotion. Good rhyming, it's not forced or cliched. Very intelligently written. I like the line "Are all our religions based on dreams?" because at this very moment my boyfriend is watching a program that explores mythology and religion as exactly that. I also like the line "The conflict of Love and the conflict of Hate." I wasn't so sure this fit the criteria of my contest (being about a mental illness) but in a very metaphorical way, especially that final line, it could. You can love yourself yet hate yourself for the illness, and the different symptoms could be reduced to manifestations of love and hate. Still, for the benefit of other readers, could you maybe specify which mental illness this is supposed to represent? Thanks for entering and good luck!
-
great
A very intelligent write kept me thinking for long, I dont know what would be the right comment to make on this piece cant say it was enjoyable thats a very weak feeling it was throughly invigorating and appealed to my mind. Its been a long time since I read something like this. Thanx for sharing. -
Your poem adds such questions that would run a philosophy class for years...heady stuff... i thoroughly enjoyed the read... "who holds the triumph and the devine card?' << that was jus awesome, such a poetic way to say who the hell runs this world??
-
i love the couplets, it gives it more meaning and style
-
oy my gosh that was incredible!! i am at a loss for words. Just an awesome write!!!!
luv always
~Tiffany -
well written and not bad overall.a bit overdone but still worth the read here..Good job. This worked here for the style and the feel. OIt worked here for what it was.
-
Nice Piece!
THis is an amazing poem I've read today I love it a whole lot!It's sooo Good From the begining to the end!!!
Keep up the good work!!!
Awsome Write
-Mina
-
I really enjoyed this your words flowed so nicely and loved the way you used them to start my mind rolling.
Mia
-
Since the beginnings of this world when the artistic process was just a magic appendix of belief people asked themselves what is the line between reality and dream, how to reconstruct the beauty of the lost Garden of Eden... in my opinion this turmoil of continous search of forbbiden memories is called art. Excellent writing.
-
You have perfectly summed up manic depression, whether you actually intended to or not. Just the absolute confliction your mind goes through, and as a sufferer your poem describes the exact emotions I go through when I am in a manic state. Such a fantestic write, your an extremly talented writer. Keep up the teriffic work!
-
This poem was just something else, no don't get me wrong I did like it indeed. Good luck in the contest and keep on writing.
-
you amaze me dear Ire lad. your simplicity of complexities and beautiful art of words leave me totaly austounded. It is a sincere pleasure to read your words yet again.
Angel -
A wonderful, descriptive piece.
-
Umm since everything else has been said...than IŽll just say it in a different language!
Esta piesa fue super increible. Me encanto. Con cada palabra que leia me gustaba mas! Sigue escribiendo asi...que llegaras lejos!
*If you have problems knowing what it means im me* -
Bravo
Damn good piece. It realy excelled in description and imagery, bringing vivid images to the mind's eye. Well done, and bravo -
Very good description! This one..wow. Made me think of the conflict of love and hate. Great write!
-sydni
-
As I read this words escaped me,
I kept tinking wow,
your wording and writing truly
is amazing
~FrozenTears -
Very nice words for description. Most poets don't use them like that. Very good. Keep it up.
-
great poem. The whole comparison is a great idea. i have many poems similar to this, great job and keep it up
-
Maybe I'm the only one, but I didn't really follow this. It just seemed like for every line you were typing random things that didn't relate to the other lines. Even so, nice imagery.
-
EXCELLENT
I LOVE IT AND YOU PROBABLY ALREADY KNEW I WOULD!!!!!!!! I DON'T THINK YOU COULD WRITE ANYTHING I DIDN'T LIKE. HURRY UP AND WRITE MORE.
-
Applaud, excellent
As always Georges, you never fail to write something worth the read. This is a prime example. I loved how all the dark images rolled into one, to form the last line of 'The conflict of Love and the conflict of Hate.'
Excellent. Kate
-
absolutely stunning
hun u cease to amaze me with your writes and i just enjoyed every single bit of it and there was not one stanza that i can choose and say that i loves cause i just went head over heels with the flow of this write -
great poem, keep writting!
-
Nice Piece!
Wow......I don't know what to say this is sooooo good I love it a lot such an Excellent piece of writing:!
Keep up the good work you did a great job!
-Mina
-
Great job, with wonderful wording! I loved it! Keep on writing.
~Rocker4me -
Georges it's brilliant, really brilliand, the flow is out of this world, the word use is great, the feel is fantastic, a brilliant write, you have exeled yourself with this write, it has left me spell bound, off to my favorites, hugs Di
-
wow, what an imagination you have, and the ability to speak it. amazing stuff
-
I like how you really went beyond with the wording on this. Not often is a poem so wordy, yet as well written. Awesome job.
-
what are alpha waves? i guess I should get off my derriere and go look it up ..
-
this is quite nice , loved the flow of it , excellently written as always. love and hate they go hand and hand (se llevan de la mano) in life. very deep great job on this one!!
lots of hugs and kisses!! GND -
This seems familiar for some reason. It has a very lyrical quality to it. I really like the last two lines, especially.
-
This was dark, eerie and well done. I like the following lines:
Along with Alpha waves beating off a surreal rocky and desolate strand
Where the mermaids and the secrets do sing
And the contractions of the uterus do bring
Back to the garden of Eden, in the beginning
The white operation theatres and the conche bells ringing
And the buzz and the waves, go through your petty life
Contrasting with negativity and the ultimate conflict of strife
Good job, oh dark poet.
-
Your fingers staple pine nuts into everything you touch.
good poem. -
I love the flow and the rhythem of this poem. it was beautifully written and written with good imagery.
-
wow....i am almost speechless...but not speechless enough to just leave u hanging there without a comment! well, this poem rhymes very well! u used words that arent in anything i would write and i like that too! good job, keep it up!







































