Picture perfect is what it seems,
Picture perfect merely in dreams.
Just an illusion of the mind,
Used when you are trying to find
The hand that you most long to hold,
Both's fingers into one they mold.
Something dear held in one anothers eyes,
A moment in where they express no lies,
Time repeatedly to be frozen
Engaging in who they have chosen.
A set of law's in which you abide,
Nothing from each other will you hide,
Promising it will last forever,
Their heart shall you never sever.
Picture perfect is what it seems,
Picture perfect merely in dreams.
Words thrown back in your face,
Laugh it off with such disgrace.
Cuddle your covers as they spring near
Those all too familiar little tears.
Play it off as a silly little game,
Deep inside your treacherous heart you tame.
Repeat over that he is just a friend,
battling tears, illusions do you end.
Such a silly thing did you do,
Never ever would he love you.
Keep pretending your perfectly fine,
Still wishing that he could have been mine.
Picture perfect is what it seems,
Picture perfect merely in dreams.
Author notes
Not too happy with the end result..But if you got it, love isn't perfect, and it sucks. And if you noticed also..it has fucking meter. Ciao...
Written April 20th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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Hmm..after reading one poem..i had to read another...
Your right..love isnt perfect, and yet we all wish it could be. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes its great..hopefully you have now found love that doesnt hurt so much! I really like how you set up how love is supposed to be..then brought it back down to how it really is sometimes. Masterful write..I enjoyed it!
~jenn~ -
I love this write you have a great talent keep using it.
Love Sandra
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Oiy, i totaly relate to this right now ><
good job chica 
well done.
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you said you dont like the end result? why? i loved it and if anyone was gonna give you an honest opinion its me, i only believe in contructive critism and what jonnyfaint said was destuctive critism, he must be so jealous that he needed to try sabotage it.
i mean, 'i think it needs more flavor and the more colorful diction will enhance the tone', colourful diction? flavor? tone?
IS THIS GUY SMOKING CRACK?
i think you used your words well, its very visually descriptive and it has a good rhythm to it, as if it were a song
loved it, love you and i hope you find happiness(H-A-P, P-E-N-I-S) soon, i just wish i lived in the u.s, ur fricken hot
anywho
outtie -
The one thing I hate about people on this site is when they comment on my poems trying to challenge my dark writes. If they disagree, it's their own business. All I want is a good critique. So, I'm not going to challenge you.
Someone above mentioned that they didn't feel the apathy. But I don't think it was apathy you were going for. I liked the way you built it up and then tore it down. The bitterness(which I think is what you were going for) was there. In the the third last stanza, this line "Deep inside your treacherous heart you tame." Though it was a lovely use of wording, it kind of threw the flow off a bit. Anyway, that's piece. This was still a beautiful and wonderful poem
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'Wow. i like this a lot. very well written, you have a talent for words...keep up the great work and i will be looking forward to more from you soon.
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flowed well and it was complete but i didn't get a sence of feeling or apathy, something seemed stale, im not sure, i think because i just read on of the best poems on here, which kinda sucks for anyone whos next because i have a lingering raddness on my mind, but anyways i think this poems needs more colorful words, you have the meter down, but now i think you could give the theme or meaning your write a kick in the words, don't get me wrong, its well written, but i think it needs more flavor and the more colorful diction will enhance the tone
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it's been a while since i've read a poem that rhymes and I have to say i find a sort of comfort in the structure of the formatting. nice write, i really like it.
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I can feel the pain of the rejection here, and my heart goes out to you. I really hope that it was not as harsh as it sounds here, otherwise its a terrible tragedy, but also the person who rejected you is a fool. Keep writing, its amazing.
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i just love the way it was created captured lots of readers to enjoy the piece!!great poem.
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Yay for fucking meter? LOL I like this ebabybay. What's wrong chica? Anyhow, this poem is good, I like the ryhme and the fucking meter. Good job on this.
~*Destiny*~ -
your right, nothing's perfect
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i loved this piece, the honesty flowed through this, it was intense. a deep emotional piece i truly loved this. its beyond words.
-Broken -
awesome:-)
Aww I love this poem..it had emotion to it and it rhymes quiet well...I agree with Rob Rivers I love the lines 'Picture perfect is what it seems, Picture perfect merely in dreams.I love this...I'm bookmarking it:-)Keep up thw fricken awesome work:-)PC24 -
i enjoyed the rhyme of this one, not forced one bit. i could feel the angst in it very well... thanx for sharing
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great imagery....the ryhme and flow of this piece were excellent. I really enjoyed reading this and will come back to read more of your work.
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Indeed this poem was interesting. I like the imagery, though. It's very nice ly written Especially the lines where you say 'Picture perfect is what it seems, Picture perfect merely in dreams. ' That to me and many people I know is very true, and I ike the way you expressed it.
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I really liked it. It's an excellent write.
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Incredible
Beautiful poem. I absolutley loved it because it is so true and i can definitely relate.Awesome job -
Hey, do ya remember me? I remember you sun! but yeah, this was a beautifully written poem if i have ever read one! I know the feeling of thinking that you have found something great and having that smashed into oblivion. the rhyme and flow were awesome. keep up the great work!
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Good poem, I like how it's written, but it could have gone together a little better.
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Absolutely awesome poem! I am left awestruck by this poem. Such a powerful meaning behind it, and it all came together so nicely I read it three times. I am really glad to have come across this, and truly enjoyed reading. The chorus made the poem, and you did a great job. Thanks for posting, and keep it up.
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interesting the way you put this sometimes ppl dont know what they have until it's gone and sometimes love is justy picture erfect making it wonderful and perfect for all who read it i like the way ur flow was so smoot never bracing for bumps it moved on like you wanted more and you got it great poem
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