Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

My Dreamgirl

My Dreamgirl

Silence in my mind
hugging a pillow tight
In my thoughts you are here
you... my only 'one of a kind'..
with you all feels so right..
close to you, I have nothing to fear

I look at the sky outside
dark, but full of light
stars, twinkling from afar
but the biggest sparkle of all
Is still miles away from me..
close in heart.. yet untouchable..

In my heart I miss you more
than in my voiceless mind

My thoughts drift off
to a time far from us
I hold you in my arms
as we walk on
through the field of feelings
blossoming with the flowers
of the times we thought of eachother

a tear drops from my eye
bringing me back to the cold reality
summer is still months away
I fall to sleep..
hoping to hold you
and cherish you in my dreams

for you are...

my dreamgirl...

Filip H.F. "FiXato" Slagter,
Monday 14 March 2005; first part between 01:50 and 02:20 and between 17:00 and 17:25

Author notes

Filip H.F. \"FiXato\" Slagter,
Monday 14 March 2005; first part between 01:50 and 02:20 and between 17:00 and 17:25
Written March 14th, 2005

In a list

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • FiXato
    August 31, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    not really a solid reason for it being on the right hand side, I just found it made the flow look better.
    Thanks all for commenting


  • grannyeri gold member
    August 30, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    So different having the writing on the right hand side - is that for any special reason. A different font also makes it stand out. Lovely.


  • Pin Cushion Queeny
    April 11, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is a really beautiful poem (thanks for your comment by the way) I think we all have a picture of a dream person and I think you portray it beautifully, not the physical picture of the person but rather the sense of the relationship and I think that is more sentimental and so works better ... but that's me. It reminds me of two things, not to bring it down, but of an episode of Ally McBeal where a woman had a kind of dream family and in her dreams she was happy and married with three children but in her real life she was alone and paralyzed and in the end a court ruling that she was allowed to be kept in a coma where she was happy, i'm not a big fan of Ally McBeal, but it was a rilli touching episode and although the idea seemed preposterous it seemed the happier alternative to let her remain in permanent sleep and also a episode of black books that's all about a summer girl, but more the idea of a summer girl and i thought the concept of that was quite sweet. Sorry to relate out to TV ... i hope your not offended or anything.
    Edited on Apr 11, 2:17 p.m. because ''.


  • Touchof1der silver member
    April 11, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    This is stunning. This is a poem that was definately intended for someone specific. Your words flow so beautifully down the page and they land with such tenderness and care. Very nice indeed. Thankk you for such a pleasurable read!
    ♥ Kimberly


  • PaulaHUGADDICT
    April 11, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    and its ehm.. the next time in row you're replying with my own words You cheater: P


  • PaulaHUGADDICT
    April 11, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    btw, I usually don't read such SMALL TINY FONTS! - (only in documents that I have to sign)


  • FiXato
    April 11, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for your sincere comments Means a lot to me

    And paula, also mind the date of this poem when it was written (just using your own words )
    -- Monday 14 March 2005 --
    sooo that's been a while since then. And in the meantime more sadness has made place for pleasure and joy


  • PaulaHUGADDICT
    April 11, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    heartbreakingsadness

    why are you doing this? I mean it's sad.. and I think that it shoudln't be. Well, maybe it's due to your style.. it always squeezes me and makes my tears run down the cheek. FiXato- the tears squeezer.. but no..
    Why the hell it isn't with a tiny piece of happines.just tiny.. little... THAT little.. It sounds as if you..are sad... don't be coz .. she is probably waiting for you and missing you the same as you miss her.. Don't be sad anymore... DO NOT, DO NOT DARE to be sad.. you should feel happy as like in one of my admired quote of sb:
    "I opened my window and my heart. THe rays of sunshine have flooded my room, and love has flooded my soul"
    So let that "sparkle" flood you, and enlighten you..make you happier.. coz without her you woudln't be happy, just still down I persume..don't drawn into sad emotions..you're just wasting your health... and SMILE, she's there - missing you, caring about you, thinking.. and she definetelly can't wait till summer TOO.. so..the next poem PLEASE, I want to read something joyful, happy and hope.
    Cheer up my friend.

    btw.. I love this poem if you still haven't noticed..she must feel so special.. I would if... :-)

  • LunarKnight
    April 10, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    interesting poem... quite beautiful imagery and yet so sad... sometimes those go good together though. Well, here's a toast to all our dreamgirls out there... nice write.

    ~LunarKnight~


  • DeceivedLove
    April 10, 2005
    Edit | Reply

    beautifully sad

    i would truly cry to this if i cried to poems... its sad and it makes me feel inside the way i do when i watch those sad movies... ... well those movies that arent meant to be sad but really are. i would applaud ur poem but i have none left... its tha thought that counts though

1 - 10 of 10