Shall I cry a river...
can I spare the time
knowing me forever
love was always blind
trust was always present
in this world of ours
sitting close together
staring at the stars
silence sits next to me
where you once held court
dried up words of comfort
do nothing but distort
So shall I cry a river
or sing about the blues
a rhapsody to haunt me
your melody I choose.........
Author notes
Written April 9th, 2005
In a list
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
-
Thank you my friend
-
cool and sweet
-
I appreciate your opinion
Thank you , I dont normally rhyme but this poem just ended up rhyming. Not my normal style as I prefere freestyle as being more expressive ( that is just me, I am not generalising) I take on board your suggestions. Many thanks for taking the time to help
-
Thank you
-
Oh I'm sorry you are down. Im having a bit of a rough peiod myself, but as I always say
When the world is crying crimson tears, make your mind your sanctuary. -
Yes, I do agree that this read a lot like a song. And 'twas a very good read. Very well written.
But I didn't like the
"silence sits next to me
where you once held court
dried up words of comfort
do nothing but distort"
verse.
I think that the second and third lines seem pretty stretched into rhyme, and the "court" image doesn't really gel with the rest of the poem.
But that's just my opinion, the rest of the poem is great. -
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
love it, this would go great with music, i want to SING!!! i love this kind of poem, write lots more!!! favorite line: a rhapsody to haunt me; I LOVE THIS POEM!!!!!!!!! -
Thank you Michael, I appreciate your kind comments
-
Excellent
Wow, this is truely a sad story. Nothings worse then when they are gone but your heart wants to tell you different. Excellent piece expressing those emotions. Keep up the great writes. Take care.
Michael -
This is a great read! I love it, and I know how you feel. I like this poem a lot, and you did a great job writing it, vivid imagery, and I love the way you rhymed, another great effect
I love it. Lovely read, and I hop that things will get better for you. These are my favorite lines:
trust was always present
in this world of ours
sitting close together
staring at the stars
I like these lines becuase I have done the same thing, and felt the same way in the end. Nice write, I love it. -
Thanks my friend..yes you caught me on a dark day
-
Oh Ms Cutie this reads rather down for you - hope it stops raining soon. - Still it's a great read for me - thank you
1 - 12 of 12






2 old applause
