Stay away from me, do not approach
You'll be sorry if you do
For if you get too close to me
Bad luck will come to you
Everything shatters when I'm around
Disaster follows in my wake
I don't want anyone close to me
For their sanity and safety's sake
I am an omen of doom and unease
I am a black cat crossing your path
I bring nothing but sorrow to those I love
I invoke actions of violence and wrath
I will never make anyone happy
I will never do anything right
A touch of my hand brings death and destruction
It turns black what once was white
You may think I'm stretching the truth
You may think surely it's not as bad as I say
But I urge you, mind my warnings
For your own good, stay away!
Do not try to be my friend
Don't expose yourself to my curse
And never, ever accept a ride from me
Or your next ride might be in a hearse.
Hurry past when you see me in the streets
Don't let me catch your eye
And whatever you do, don't let yourself love me
For those who love me will surely die.
So keep away, protect yourself
Don't let my curse unfurl
It's better for all if I am alone
For I am a jinx girl
Author notes
option 4
A contest entry
- Username Contest by Alexandra Saint.
300 points, ended May 31, 2006, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - randomness!!! by country-girl.
600 points, ended October 22, 2007, 27 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Random Option Contest by GypsyEyes.
375 points, ended February 6, 2008, 14 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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i really liked all the rhyme you put in to this! i happen to like your name! i'm sure you don't bring that much bad luck to people! thank you for entering!
~NineTailedFox -
whoo, there's alot of darkness in this piece. however, i still enjoyed it. it told me alot about you. and it was wonderfully written. thank you for entering!!
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A-
I like the rhyme a lot. I think it works really well, and you make a very shadowy, almost surreal portrait of yourself. The only part of your poem I found at all shaky was the rhythm: yoou kind of have to force it a little to make it seem like one rhytm throughout.
I like all your different examples of what happens when one crosses the path you create for yourself. It's kind of like those 5-paragraph essays we have to write, but yours is cool and not about the Russian Revolution.
Kudos, and good luck!
Bekca. -
This was a very good pome I throughly enjoyed reading it though I do hope I can will see a black cat I own two...
Very nice flow I really liked it good luck
Elf -
Dear Jinxgirl,
This was right on for the rhyme and rhythm and the unfolding of the many misfortunes was certainly well worth the effort here. A good pick for your name - I don't know - so far I don't see any black cats around so I think I'll be safe in just reading and leaving a comment and an applause! Good Luck in the contest.
Tang -
i like this poem. And thank u for entering my contest.
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jinxed eh. well for some people if they had no bad luck, they'd have no luck at all
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Wow, love all the metaphors:
"I am an omen of doom and unease
I am a black cat crossing your path."
This is an amazing write, all the rhymes seem natural, and it flows very well. Keep it up!
~ J
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Great!
Great write, I like this poem a lot. This is well written. Thanks for sharing it! nice write!
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Excellent
That was a great poem! I really enjoyed it. Especially, "Do not try to be my friend
Don't expose yourself to my curse
And never, ever accept a ride from me
Or your next ride might be in a hearse." Great job! -
Hey this was a really good piece of work. I enjoyed reading it. Very nicely put. I liked how when you ryhmed it all came together and made since. really nice. KEEP IT UP!!! l8erz
+!~Confused CRow~!+
p.s. this is a comment for your contest...i used sentences 1,2,6, and 9...good luck on the judging...l8erz -
woah,this was bad ass. you are awsome! i love this poem. it's so great and just, bad ass!! so rockin'.
~Alex
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