Awaken child of darkness
From the point of return
A lonely creature in hell
You will forever burn
Skin so transparent winter white
Seeking victims, in the deep black night
Footprints soft and silent
Never will they hear
Powers from the crypt
It is you they hear
Warm flow of blood
Thirst to lust
Powerless to fight,relax at your touch
Pounce with fangs of death
Useless struggles, draw one last breath
Feed upon mortals, forever stay alive
Thrill of the kill
On this you survive
Life's red blood wine, drunk til dry
The master at work chills to the bone
In misery no one ever walks alone
Creature of darkness softly sighing
Offering you a last kiss
Just before dying~
Author notes
Number 4 Vampire
Written October 24th, 2002
In a list
A contest entry
- Vampyre/Fantasy Contest by Alahmorah.
300 points, ended January 7, 2005, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 51 of 51
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Heh heh. Sums up the quintessential vamp. Nice romatic flowy-cape image, altho the font and backround I found rather humerous..... nice to see summat other than black on red!
Awritan
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Nice dark and chilling write Susan. Good dark and mysterious description in you words. After thinking about drinking blood like wine it will never seem the same. Good luck in the contest. Take care and Have fun. Steve
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oooo... I liked this part soooo much :
In misery no one ever walks alone
Creature of darkness softly sighing
Offering you a last kiss
Just before dying~
You did that so well, woman! Your "small" collection sure is amazing. Well done! Good luck in the contest
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eek!!! {runs & hides}
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Good one, Sis! A last kiss just before dying (what a way to go) Good Luck in the contest!
Love Ya!
<3 Maureen
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Yes, nice poem. I didn't like this part, however: "Footprints soft and silent
Never will they hear
Powers from the crypt
It is you they hear" When I read it, this little piece didn't seem to fit with the rest. But, good poem nonetheless. Best of luck in my contest. Love, Ashlee
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Excellent
OH my! This is so good! Love this kind of thing, you made it so eeire, (SP) and very vivid! It's like a great story told, I was caught up in it....Excellent in every way! It was so clear, it was like watching a movie! Outstanding! -
It gives me the chills and I love it as usual. I can imangine a deep voice awakening the dead. powerful.
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You know not all are evil as you might think....
DimishedFaith -
Incredible
Beautiful! I enjoyed this one, and plan to read all of your other Vamp writes. I'm glad that you enjoyed my poem as well. -
What a wonderful write I just loved this part!
Creature of darkness softly sighing
Offering you a last kiss
Just before dying~
Lovely imagination! Keep up the good work! ^_^ -
sweet!!!
i lov da pic! i lov da write! this is so sweet
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neutral
oooooh hon... chilling. definitely love the morbid note to this one... gr8 work :o)
huge hugs,
xxx -
don't touch it!
Another great Vampyre poem. I loved it, and I love that pic! :o)
~*~Gi~*~ -
don't touch it!
OH HELL YEAH!! Something I can sink my teeth into.
One for the favs.
Fang you for sharing
Vodney -
neutral
OOhhhh morbidly romantic, you really nailed a good one here, I loved it, lived up to the title 'very' well, and I was glad I picked it out of a forever long list of your works, mmmmmmmm, kinda feelin a bit inspired off of this one, morbid romance, where can I go with that one, we'll see, if I don't get lost on yourpages for too long before losing that thought LOL, anywhos susan, you have yet again offered up another outstanding write, so worthy of being on 'everyones' favorites lidt you are:), -
don't touch it!
love this poem! an erotic vampire tale always makes my ...blood rise. -
excellent
I loved it...I like the feeling in it...especialy the end about the kiss.... -
don't touch it!
Your pictures are always awesome, as are your poems! Why have I always liked vampires? Their sophistication? Seductiveness? Whatever it is you drew me in. Great job :E -
LOL I dont think so Catz but i do write ghost stories for our local paper at Halloween and i ghost hunt in the summer when i can anywhere in Ky that i can get to,always believe in ghost so maybe thats where this imagination get me too ha ha ....Have always loved haunted things and spooky things as far back as i can remember
Thanks for all your comments
Susan~ -
don't touch it!
OOOOHH... this is creepy, and wonderful.... almost makes ya want that bite...
Very good, Susan...ummmm...do you have some kind of inside info the rest of us don't have??...lol
dee -
neutral
I really like this! Love me vampires. speically bad ones like Spike(or used to be) and kinda bad ones like Lestat...ima go now... -
don't touch it!
This is so very much all things vampire...sensual, frightening...Dark and terrible yet beautiful...Bravo once again...You're the best...Blessings...Romhain -
excellent
Chilling, my vamp friends would love...it sends goose bumps up the arms...lol...hugs and blessings, daoine -
excellent
Ooh...nice and morbid. Good work with the rhyming, spooky images here -
neutral
Really cool background ..That's the coolest Vampire i have ever seen!!!....Great writing on this....Love spooky stufff!... Love* and SmileS* CaUsAL~~...:*) -
don't touch it!
wow!!! awesome.. where do you get your inspiration girl..loved it!!!! ~~~GILL~~~xx -
don't touch it!
Can feel the nails running down the chalk board now. Youch. Great work -tj- -
excellent
There is something so sexy about vampires (only the good-looking ones, though) LOL Very tasty poem..hehe I like my meat blood-rare...maybe I'm halfway there! Muhhahahahaaa Great poem, great pic'! -
don't touch it!
Girlie...this is awesome. I really likes...whole heap-o-bunches. Note, though...just something that caught me way out of whack...'no one never' = 'no one ever'. HUGS. Keep em coming gilie. -
don't touch it!
Wow.....this is great!!!
a beautifully dark and creepy write.
Keep it up sis,
Ann -
don't touch it!
Hmmmm, I am with Barbs on this, yummy ..;) -
don't touch it!
Wonderfully, wicked write:) Very seductive:)
Karen -
excellent
enjoy these poems :) -Brandon -
don't touch it!
this is so mmmmm mmm mmmm....gothic yum
:)! -
neutral
I love dark stuff, the darker the better, this peom her visually perfect, I have a suggestion that will change this peom into a night of lust. Change it so that you are the victim, and he is swepting you off your feet, in dark forboding passion. -
don't touch it!
great pic and even greater write,I do like this.mmm I have a thing about my neck too,yummy....well penned..regards Janxx -
don't touch it!
As fluid as the night, is this one, Susan. You really captured the essence of the vampire. And the picture...those eyes. Wonderful compliment to one another.
Maddie
Edited by Apparition on Oct 24. -
excellent
'Je vais obtenir quelquechose a la banque de Sang' as Dracula might have put it!
Iain aka Morgan -
don't touch it!
Hope the sun comes up soon!
Toothy critter how would you like your stake?
Well done!
RR -
excellent
This is a great piece, I too like Vampyre's, some of them are my best friends. Lol! -
neutral
ooh now him i would want to nibble on my sinews! -
Thanks so much all of you all your comments appreciate
I had up another pic and i like Bar thought it did not do the poem justice so i changed it to this
Again thank you
Susan
xoxoxo -
don't touch it!
Wonderful write Susan .... *shivers run down my apine*
Thank you,
Sammy. -
neutral
Amen to that Barbs ....;) -
excellent
Like this lots, but i feel the pic doesn't really do it any favours.. i have a thing about my neck being bitten..its sooo erotic..hee,hee
Barbsxx -
excellent
You're writing here is top notch. This one of the best pieces I've read on anything of the Gothic nature. Great write.
Jack -
neutral
:) Well, in the opposite direction me thinks my monk... lol....Had to come and have a look at this again....Hmmmmmm...
Edited by WisperingSkyz on right now. -
neutral
'In misery no one never walks alone'
Interesting thought on its own. Where is Ce going with this one????? hahaha Nice one....... keep it up.
Monk -
don't touch it!
this is a creepy dark piece but very nicely done...well written Susan :) -
don't touch it!
Whoa wait, she looks like she is liking this right??? ;)
Hmmm, nice one Susan, love bites no??? ( I think I am getting an entirely different picture here than wot you mean, lol.....)
That Background is great! Me likes this one hun...Hugs, ~~~ Ce
Edited by WisperingSkyz on right now.
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