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M&M's? Who knew?

Being a food product consumed by humans, I have been rewarded with mass amounts of time to study you fascinating creatures. It is thusly that I have come to the following conclusion: 90% of humans have an IQ level below that of mine. And I am a confectionary.

    While perched atop the highest shelf of aisle 5 in the grocery store, I have come, in my day, to hear some of the most idiotic things being said. Most of them, I will admit, were said by the cute blonde grocery clerk with the tight bum, but never mind that. One time there was a young girl wandering around the store talking to herself. While wandering down my aisle, I overheard this piece of conversation, "Sometimes I wonder, Why am I here? What is my purpose?, and then I remember . . . cereal, I'm out of cereal . . . aisle 5." this girl was obviously insane. Another time I . . . "Hey, hey, what are you doing? Put me down this instant!!! Pick another bag of M&M's! Hey, I'm talking to you! I taste bad, I swear, I really do! No, no, don't open the bag, bad grocery clerk. Ooo, nice bummmm . . . (fade out)


                            *THE END*

Author notes

Spaz, spur of the moment, let's enter a contest kind of thing. Sweet seduction, sorry I had to put that in there.
Written March 28th, 2005

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 8 of 8
  • DragonLight
    April 7, 2005
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    ROFLOL! ~Dies of Laughter~ I love it! I needed a good laugh today and you gave it to me!

  • GoldenHope
    March 28, 2005
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    that was very cute and very funny!! put me down--ooh nice bum. lol. and i liked the part about the 'insane' woman who forgot why she was there. this was very funny! i just wish it was longer! great job
    ~Jess


  • WhatShouldUsBe
    March 28, 2005
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    Lol, this is the funniest thing I have read today! I really loved it, especially the cute blonde clerk with the tight bum lol! That was perfect, I wish you the best of luck in the contest and I hope to see more of your work. Maybe you'll have something a bit more serious but I wouldn't mind another good laugh~!~

  • MysteryCraze
    March 28, 2005
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    Thanks XxEmotionlessxX I have no idea where I got it, and had no idea people would like it, thanks.


  • BeautifulChaos
    March 28, 2005
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    Cute, very cute. I can't stand chocolate myself, so I'll let those innocent little M&M's be.


  • March 28, 2005
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    Omg, that was hilarious.. Great outlook, and I have no idea where you came up with something THAT different! You, my friend, are very creative... I loved it. I hope you win the contest, good luck!


  • Kalima
    March 28, 2005
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    This was cute and funny... I loved the ending...Great write. From SlightlyTwisted

  • Jade Darklinmoon
    March 28, 2005
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    lmmfao omg that was funny as hell. i thoroughly loved it. you had me laughing so hard. well done and thank you so much for entering my insane contest. Good Luck

1 - 8 of 8