by ~Gregg Rowe~
My life -- cemetery of people dead,
I’ve knelt on weakened knees to pray --
My angels stand before my temple bed.
My heart through peace and love – it will be fed,
My inner One Self, -- I will stay:
My life – cemetery of people dead.
From God’s temper -- our Lucifer had fled --
On golden wings – my soul’s astray,
My angels stand before my temple bed.
On my heart, I wear ribbons bleeding red:
A chronic illness -- came my prey --
My life -- cemetery of people dead.
For mosaic of friends – my ink has bled,
By songs and poems -- with words I play:
My angels stand before my temple bed.
In my conscious, everything has been said:
Boyhood Father -- I come -- Obey:
My life -- a cemetery of people dead,
My angels stand before my temple bed.
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Author notes
Written March 26th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- A Real Villanelle by BlackSatinRose.
450 points, ended December 21, 2005, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Form Contest! [contest] by rainwalker.
450 points, ended December 25, 2006, 25 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - TEACH ME HOW TO WRITE A Villanelle by Swan song.
800 points, ended July 15, 2007, 19 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 22 of 22
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tweak it
I like the idea behind this piece, but you have a few lines that are very awkward and break up the flow here. For example:
"My life -- cemetery of people dead,"
and
"My inner One Self, -- I will stay:"
You have the form down, you have a great idea for the theme of the piece and every other line flows well and is clear and easy to understand. I think this is a good piece that could use just a little tweaking.
Thank you for entering and have a very Merry Christmas!
~Laura
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Wow, this really seems almost like a John Donne work. It's desolate and hopeful at the same time. The verse are all really nice and youhave chosen all your words and phrases really well. Beautiful.
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Ah we meet again.
Yet it is not my contest you are gracing but that of another and won what's rightfully yours. You are prehaps the most amazing person I have yet to meet besides of course the one who's stolen my heart. 
Love the poem. There's not much else to say. 
~Yink -
Well your poem certainly deserved all it got, if not more. Don't thank me, thank God for blessing you with such an amazing talent. Take care and God bless.
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Someones-Nobody: I want to thank you for honoring my poem with a Gold Trophy, to tell you the truth I didn't think it would win, but I had a feeling that it should be entered since the stakes were so high and a Villianelle is very difficult to pen. I think this is only my third one in my lifetime I have attempted. Seeing the golf trophy next to it brought teatrs to my eyes (and I am not lying) because this is such a personal poem for me and it has been recognized with a nice award. Thank you for letting me showcase it in your contest. Gregg
Edited on Jun 05, 6:18 p.m. because ''. -
congrats indeed ... i have a feeling that this is one of most personal pieces. when u delve so deep the poetry resonates.
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Congrats on your gold, well deserved!
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I'm glad I took the time to read your authors page before i got around to judging this contest. I've read this poem a number of times and each time only become more impressed , uncovering a bit more of what this poem has to offer. Thank you for entering, take care and God bless.
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By the way I don't mean evolved in poetic talent, I mean spiritually and with the power of peace and courage that fighting brings.
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This is incredibly readable and so evolved from the first poem I read of yours back in November.
It seems your spirit is lighting up with holy fire these days.
I'm glad. How's Winnie the Pooh?
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"My life -- cemetery of people dead"
For that line and its profound meaning, I applaud thee
Good imagery, view, concept, and over all performance,
Take care,
Buki
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"My life -- a cemetery of people dead" interesting view and lovely motif. good job. thanks for entering my contest.
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This was a very touching poem both in a spiritual way and in a sad way it stirrs emotions in my heart which in my opinion is what makes a write for me. If I can feel your words then they have served there purpose to me as a reader. You write well my dear and I will be reading more!
huggles
~Lena~ -
This is incredible, Gregg And really not surprising, considering yours is some of the greatest poetry this site has to offer. What a sad piece, and yet it's not as if I am a fly on the wall, watching you pain ...you draw the reader into your emotions, and it's such a hard thing to do. Great work, my dear... and thanks for entering
~Smidge 
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great poem. i loved it! the flow with the ryhme and repetition wass wonderful. good luck in the contest!
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Truly an excellent poem, you fit the style quite nicely, choosing words that flow together like cheese and wine...
And while those of us who look to the cemetery to remember the loved ones we lose, we shouldn't forget to look into the hospital to see the young faces of those we gain....
Best of luck, Gregg. -
Dear Gregg,
I quite often reflect on the loved ones I have lost, where once they were the older generation, now I find that I now fall into that category, pretty scary thought. I know you have lost a lot of your young friends, it's such a waste to see them go so young, before they have lived. and this is one
who stands beside your temple bed, will never leave your side, never, you are so very special my 
Brother
Love~Joan
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Dear Gregg,
I find this poem profoundly relative.
Life seems to be a growing cemetery of those who have gone before us. In my case, my grandparents, then my parents, one daughter, my first wife, recently another daughter and, with increasingly frequent intermissions, other relatives and friends. Thus the world of our life becomes progressively emptier of those we have known and loved and we cling with greater intensity to those who remain here with us as we ourselves feel our own impending mortality.
That is all implied in your above words and my rambling comment is proof of the power of your message.
At this Easter period it behoves us well to reflect on Him whose Life and Death set an example of Hope and Life Eternal.
Thankyou Gregg, for sharing your thoughts. Applause,
Regards and best wishes, buddy. Hugh.
Edited on Mar 27, 4:28 p.m. because 'typos'. -
This is simply beauty in all of its sadness. Mortality is the enemy we face from birth, till finally the ferryman takes us on that final ride. This is death, kissed with all the tenderness of a life well lived and full of love. Dante would envy your words. Bravo my friend....and smile.
Blessed be
~~Serenity~~
Billie Jean -
i was never one for rhymed verse or following rules when writing,but i really like the way this villanelle flows.and the lines that you used to repeat adds so much to this.
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Gregg, this is wonderful,your Angel certainly does stand before you, always will. I can imagine you have lost a lot of friends over the years, it is so sad when they go so young. You fight on Gregg, we need you here~Lov~jen
Edited on Mar 27, 8:31 because 'because I forgot'. -
Very good
This read like lyrics to a church hymn, a spiritual. I don't know if you were going for that, but I've been reading a lot of those lately and they are all very pretty and this is very much as pretty. It seems pretty deep, but I understood it for the most part, I think. Very good.
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