sunbeams dance
on fresh new buds
spring arrives
Author notes
I just Had to choose spring!
Written March 23rd, 2005
A contest entry
- Free Form Haiku by CarterTachikawa.
300 points, ended March 28, 2005, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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I love spring and you painted a beautiful picture of it with your words. I like these little poems when done right they can hold so much meaning with few words. awsome work
huggles
~Lena~ -
A very lovely take, on what I hope, is the spring that will be coming SOON! I can hardly wait to see those buds with the sunbeams dancing on them. Yay spring!
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I love this. It reminds me of the first spring rain and afterwards a beautiful rainbow comes out into the baby blue sky and the rose pettals have the fresh water dropplets dancing down. This is a great peice.. Keep it up.
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This is a real haiku. I mean the sound and structure. I understand that it is not usual, but what I usually read as that is 5, 7, 5 is not really haiku.
I am the teacher in the songwriting class and have been writing songs since 70. The two I mentioned assisted me with the class.
I probably need to rewrite the comment.
Andy -
Spring is definitely right around the corner
I know it has already passed, but it still snows up here in CT. Gotta love it, lol. Anyways, I just wanted to say that I loved this and thought that it was very beautiful!! God Bless You my friend!!
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WOW... This is a wonderful off-syllable haiku!!! I just love spring time!!! Good luck in the contest!!!
Hugs,
Beth
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Oh, Penny, this was wonderful. I don't know how you can come up with just the right words to say so much in such a concise way. Every line spoke of spring, something most of us have been waiting for. Lovely, nothing less. ~vj
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I wish spring would arrive sooner, at least spring weather
Great imagery!
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Excellent
I love haikus, and this one is fresh like spring. Very Pretty! -
This is just excellent, i love spring too. It seems like the sun dances with the clouds this time of year.
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Three lines, packed full of meaning and excellence. It just doesn’t get much better than that. You have done a very nice job with this piece.
~ John
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Very good
Great words to think about. A little tough now since it's raining cats and dogs, but a beautiful sentiment. A new life begins anew. Keep up the great writing. Take care and God Bless.
Michael -
This was a great entry. It had nice imagery and a good theme. I love spring. I wish the best with the contest.
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Spring is a good choice. Heck, spring just arrived this week! Perfect haiku for the season's arrival. Beautiful images. Nice lines too. Thanks for entering and good luck!
~CT
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