Look at her, with her stupid fucking Ugg boots
Low cut tattered whore pants
I was wearing Uggs in 86
When the internet, and i-pods were
Still UFOs. Now look at this?
Everywhere I turn... Britney, Lindsey,
And Ashley are shoving Starbucks
And cell phones up my ass
With a backpack full of corporate
Dickchins, and telephone company
Head-games to boot, BIG MONEY.
My ass, soul-less fags,
and Velvet mafia blow jobs.
I want a gun man
I don't even like blonds
And these Paris Hilton types
Are the worst fucks
SOOO BAD IN BED, they make the typical
over achieving young Jewish lawyer
With a little Dick on Viagra seem saint.
I'm sick of it
I'm staring off my balcony
Every day at the Pacific
Wearing my tidal wave boats
and building an Arc that
I'll get to row over
satellite dish upon
Bobbing satellite dish
heaped full of these
happy meal teenage
mall twats begging
To get on board
Apologizing for being
So pathetic, plastic,
and dim witted. To which
I'll reply with my
hand shaped like a cell
Phone against my head,
and my other hand flipping
them the dumb dove,
'Can you hear me now?'
Author notes
Written March 18th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Real Beauty by darkcardinal.
300 points, ended April 24, 2006, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 25 of 25
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Wow so full of angst... me likes this
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Alas, they're here to stay. But think of it this way: they'll be the first against the wall when the revolution comes. Thanks for entering.
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yep, just how i feel but im too damn lazy to say it
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Damn skippy. I can always depend on your work to be edgy and honest. It's very refreshing.
This reminds me of a Bukowski line - "Cynicism is the natural reaction to living within the confines of this god damn cage." (Or maybe he said "madness" is the natural reaction. Can't recall now. It amounts to the same thing, though.)
It seems like most people just ride along with all the BS and never think about what a sham most of it is. The blind leading the blind. Crap piled on crap with some crap sprinkles.
Just be careful - clarity can drive you nuts in this world. The human race would be doing the same thing whether or not you and I had ever been born. And crusaders almost always end up becoming broken down cynics. Better to laugh at it all and not let it drive you nuts, even while adding a voice of sanity to the fray. There's just too much to get annoyed about. Eminem, for instance. lol
Mark -
wow. This poem is exactly how I feel about society right now. Everyone can relate to this. Great job.
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Kind of like Girl Scout dolls made of Happy-Meal plastic who don't understand gay guys. I suppose it could also be a bit like the seas of pollution.
trick -
This is true, so many people are SO FUCKING FAKE! And it is getting FUCKING ANNOYING! I agree. I mean the world is going downhill. This was an awesome piece of work, telling it the way it truly is, not caring if your talk is brutal, now that is what is awesome bout this! Awesome piece dude, awesome piece.
-Veira Ash -
Ha! This is so great, and yet so true. Everyone is conforming to something or someone and has to be like this or like that. And I, too, and sick of it!! I love how you ended it. Once, at my school, they called my Chorus director and when he picked up no one was there so he starts walking around going "can you hear me now?" and after awhile the front office came on and we all laughed at him. But this was a great poem. The backround fit too...it's like celebrities are posining us.
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What's wrong with the world is that it's all too crass to pay attention to. After all, you wouldn't wan't to get any crass smears, or ethnic slime on your shoes.
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A little too crass for my apetite, but suffice it to say, when the Williams sisters can sign 30 million dollar contracts for a day's modeling job to sell Reeboks, while the poor grunt in China or Indonesia earns pennies an hour to make them, something is dreadfully wrong with this world.
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I love your brazen style. F'em all... At first I read this to be about Cali, on second thought, not sure the East Coast is much better... do people even care that they are now made of the same plastic their "cellies" are? As always, love your thinking.
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How appropriate. I had to visit the mall today. I was not happy about it and yep I saw them.
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Ugg boots -- Are lamb wool lined boots from Australia.
Whore pants -- Low cut tight designer levis
Laci -- first name of laci lohan, pop idol
Head games -- someone fucking with your head
Velvet mafia -- the gay jew mafia in hollywood
Tidal wave boats -- hip waders
Mall twats -- under age whores clicking at the mall
Flipping the dumb dove -- flipping someone the bird.
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can you hear me now?...now can you hear me??
Super write, Jeremi and right on. You sure manage to get a point or two across in the most imaginative and interesting ways.
Love the poster, by the way... it would look pretty cool in my family room...or what the hell, I could put it right smack on my living room wall...next to the Monet
This piece is among my favorites of yours
Dee
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Interesting. I've always liked watching those who know whats wrong with the world. They can tell you whats fucked up but have no pathway of action to restore us to passable. Still very well done. Have you ever read Jennifer Government by Max Barry?
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This was quite interesting especially seeing I only understood about 50% of the references. I would love to know what the following mean....
Ugg boots
Whore pants
Laci
Head games
Velvet mafia
Tidal wave boats
Mall twats
Flipping the dumb dove
However I do gather you are thoroughly pissed off with much of the world.
My own hates are 4X4s, people who say "like" when it means neither "similar to" nor "love slightly", smoking, and all forms of sport.
With kind regards from swinging London. -
Wow, this is so true. Everywhere around us, there are dumb bitches that jsut dont get the fact that not everything is the movies, and that they're not Paris, or even worse, Britney. I wish more people shared your views. Rock on!
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Hilarious to a point, so true never the less.
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omg! this kicked ass...twat...a word of choice..lol..this is soo true..and I hate the Hiltons too...they don't deserve the money that they get...oh wait..they don't deserve to breathe....great write!
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5 lb piercing? I would say that's in the range 400 cool points.
Yeah, I see a lot of little girls wishing they were Paris Hilton. And what the hell is she famous for? A sex tape. Sadly, nobody wants to see a sex tape of a jewish lawyer. Damn anti semetics. -
I agree with you wholeheartedly. I, like DistantWorld, am a blond, but I hate people such as Paris and Britney who parade around like cheap harlets, flaunting their boob jobs and money. Commercialism in America has gone to far when your boob sizes counts more than the quality of the product you're trying to sell.
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no speak up, your breaking up!
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Interesting, how much would you pay for a 24 x 36?
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Right on.
Can i get a poster made of that somewhere?
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Very true. I hate what america is becoming, and even though I am far from a Paris Hilton type, I am still a blond. People now a days judge by that, and everyone is so shallow. I think I wanna be up with you just flippen people off and spitten on there designer brand clothing.
Awesome poem and I want to see more.
Bella
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