The green-leaf lace is gone, turned burlap brown,
And skies, once blue, transform to murky gray.
E’en daylight seems to wear an ugly frown,
And warmth has given up and slinks away.
The air is crisp and stings my nose and ears,
The wind wraps ‘round me with its freezing grasp
And causes eyes to fill with icy tears,
And normal voices change to hoarsey rasp.
Fierce shivers rack my body as I walk,
And toes that once were there have now gone numb.
The snow whips through the air like crystal chalk,
The struggle useless now, so I succumb.
The fireplace glows and warmth leaps out at me.
I snuggle down, a winter refugee.
Author notes
Finally the cold get to you, and you leave it for the warmth and glow of the fireplace. It's wonderful!
Our hosts have beautiful hearts.
I commented on "Jesus" by SexyAngel0418
Written March 17th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Contest of Gigantic Proportions by pattyann4500.
800 points, ended March 18, 2005, 17 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Very good write. Great imagegry and technique. Keep it up.
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Another very good poem. But I don't think you need "E'en" - "Even" fits the meter and looks more natural. Or is that just my Australian accent?
It reminded me a little of Rilke's poem "Herbstag" (Autumn day). -
As always, Well done!
Congratulations on winning the gold!
I really enjoyed reading your poem..I like the term "winter refugee"..that's how I feel.
♥ Maureen
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So this won the Gold...I hate it! I got robbed...a lousy flimsy bronze trophy is all those two bums gave me. I want a re-count!
It's a beautiful poem, and I see why you won. I live in Maine and have worked outside for much of my life so I know that feeling you describe and there have many days when the roaring fire has warmed my frozen body.
One question. Why'd did you build the fireplace in the middle of a stream?
Edited on Mar 19, 3:06 because ''. -
just had to check out the gold trophy winner
and i must say... this is excellent!
"the snow whips through the air like crystal chalk" really jumped out at me.
great job and congratulations!! -
APPLAUSE!
The imagery throughout was wonderfully done, and the line...
"The snow whips through the air like crystal chalk,"
was fantastic!
The rhyme and meter were also done VERY well, Definatly a Great sonnet!
Congratulations on your win, it was much deserved!
and blessings, Sandi
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heh heh.
interesting pic you have there Paul
but yeah this is true, that's the best thing about winter is getting cozy hee hee.
nicely done.
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Paul, this is, as usual, lovely. A remarkable write from a remarkable man. You honor us with your entry. The imagery is so perfect; "The snow whips through the air like crystal chalk;" a wonderful line.
I remember a few numb toes and fingers myself. A nice hot cup of cocoa is good for getting the fingers thawed, but I haven't really found anything better for the toes than Joe's back. LOL
Thank you, my friend, for your entry and good luck in the contest. Hugs, Patricia -
This was an intelligent and clever use of imagery. The perfect way to describe winter's icy chill. I'm glad you found that fireplace at last
You really have a gift for writing. Thanks for sharing it.
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Hey You,
Very well written as usual.. you honestly continue to amaze me with the wide range of things you can write about and forms of poems.. your sonnets are really neat though, I'm going to write one of my own one day.. I've decided Great work.
Becca -
great job Paul...i had to giggle as i read this cuz i've done just that...minus the snow alot this winter...cant wait for sunshine and butterflies...God Bless
tyler -
Dad, this was great. I loved it. YOu did so well with this. I love sitting by a fire with a cup of tea or hot chocolate and a good book. It's so nice; I actually hate summer because it's too hot for a fireplace and even if it wasn't, it's just not the same. LOL! Great job though, Dad. This was amazing. Good luck!
Love Ya
Jess
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