We should be encouraged, cosseted
by pale hands, thin as scarves.
We should be cooed over. Instead, we are punished;
people do not like to see how
something works, only that it does: our bones and our tears
frighten them. Their eyes roll blindly,
senseless as pumpkins’, seedless and hueless and heedless.
When I was smaller, I would smile
a smile that could be like a skipping-rope or, alternatively,
a knife. Amusement becomes harder to find
with age; it’s a Holy Grail of sorts. And this is acceptable -
we can learn other methods
of fitting in, dress delicately or punkish, according
to the fashion. It’s just that it’s all so, so uphill,
and it makes the calves wince
and the spine feel trembly and ill.
I’ve reached the treacherous top before now,
stood on the summit like a queen
in fine silks. But the way down is always blaringly open like
a hole or a chute, nagging at feet.
Staring down its deepness, its boat-like escape-route,
my elevators turned and fear blew
down my throat – knowing life, as I do, as that long climb back
burning hands on the rope, knowing that
feeling of falling solidly into black.
Author notes
Option 1: 'my elevators turned and fear blew down my throat'
Written March 11th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Inspired by Anne Sexton by Daniela Violin.
400 points, ended March 14, 2005, 2 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
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I love the style and classic feel to this, reminds me of some famous writers, Amazing work!
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LOVED it
Speechlessness.
... only very rarely have I felt it's cool fingers on my throat. And all I'd do here is ramble, still, but I needed at least these few minutes since my last "comment" before I could even begin to ramble.
Though I don't think any amount of rambling will be worthy. I feel attempting to analyse would by like holding up a candle to the sun, in the hope that would make it easier to see.
I also think any attempt to capture what this did to me would fall short. It's impossible to harness such a swirl of emotions and thoughts - if I tried committing them to this comment box, too much would seep out.
Instead, I think I shall leave the technical commenting to some other person with either more guts or with no ability to feel.
Just know... I loved this. I truly, really, did love this. Exceptional.
Mellor x -
Oh...
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