I Couldn't Tell You

I can't exactly tell you why
Or how it happened...
But I will not lie...

I did something terrible
And I do not know why or how.

I drank too much,
And things went the wrong way.
Was it because of who he was?
I don't know what to say.

He somehow persuaded me
To keep drinking, even when I knew something was wrong...
Now I guess I truely am the slut that I was said to be.

One after another,
The alochol slipped from the galsses...
More and more,
Not once stopping...
...crashing

I woke up,
Can't move.

The room is dark,
And the floor is cold.
I look up to a face,
So scary and cold.

His eyes glimmering,
With hate and pleasure.

I notice that
He is naked
And that I am as well.

He lays his body upon mine,
Forcefully kissing me...
Forcing himself inside me.

I scream as loud as possible,
But he grabs me and tells me "Shut the FUCK up"
No one can hear me anyway there is no way,
The music is cranked up as loud as it can be.

A sickness comes to my stomache,
As he begins pounding me harder and harder...
In and out, in and out...
Screaming and pleading,
He once again covers my mouth,
Deafening me cries for help.

Too hard he is trying to make me stop...
The room fades in and out,
Until I see and hear nothing...

Waking up in a different room,
My heart and nerves settle thinking only of it as a dream.
My head pounding,
Damnit...a hangover.

I sit up and look around the room
"Ouch" I can hear myself saying as I stand up
The pain isn't terrible,
But I can feel it twinge.

A voice murmers the words "I love you"
And the face of my ex
Comes out from under the covers...

Panicking I do not know what to do...

What the hell have I done?
How do you explain something like this to him...
To the person you love?

How do I explain,
That I was raped by your best friend?