Swallowing the pieces of my broken heart
Cutting my throat
Bleeding inside
Losing hope
Dying
Wanting to fall to the ground
Giving up
Throwing away my dreams
Like a piece of unwanted trash
One man's trash is another man's treasure
Dreams dying
Goals fading
Life worthless
All is pain
Pain of a broken heart
A heart of sorrow
A heart of love
Love that was shattered
Building up a wall
Hiding behind a mask
Running from fears
Fears that always seem to win
Crawling
In the dark
Like a blind man
Trying to escape my doom
Doom always prevails
...
Author notes
I'm going to finish this later, I have to go. Give me honest feedback.
Written March 3rd, 2005
What did you think
Comments
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What are you talking about you're writing is great! I mean wow! I really like this it is so dramatic and wonderful, It has a amazing flow. And you really put out you feel hurt and how you feel like trash and crushed. I am very sorry you feel that way....sadly we all do, but it is great you put it on writing and in such great words and imagery. This is so great, and I really look foward to reading more of your writing because you seem like a very creative writer! anywayzzz keep it up!
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i like this piece. it sounds like a beautiful rant from a hurt soul, and if thats what your going for than stay with it im not the greatest at reviewing poetry, but the poem seems to me to jump around from being really hurt from a specific incident into to how being hurt is a constant and repeated feeling , than another aspect of how you feel like giving up is in it. These are all great and intense parts to your poem but if it was ordered differently i feel it may make your piece even stronger.
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