Would you?
If I asked you to...
Would you love me
For who I am?
Would you
If you wanted to?
Or would you try
Not to succeed?
Would you?
Would you love you too?
Or can you not care
For yourself?
If you stand in the rain, I won't notice your tears
If you put on a mask, I won't see all your fears
But would you?
.......Can you?
Would you?
If she told you to...
Would you love her
For giving birth?
Would you
If you needed to?
Or could you still not
Remember then?
Would you?
Could you ever be you?
Just you when they said:
"You're a freak"
If you stand in the rain, I won't notice your tears
If you put on a mask, I won't see all your fears
Then would you?
....If I did too?
Author notes
I hope you feel you have something to write on here... perhaps it is just me who can go on and on about it 
Love, MJ
Written March 1st, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Inspiration by Starstruck.
1000 points, ended March 9, 2005, 8 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
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awesome
that was the best poem I've evr read. you did an awesome poem that I was in love with so much. Congratulations for winning 1st place in the contest you really deserved to win. I wish I had that many points but I guess I'll get there eventually.
lol. You are a really good writer,keep it up. maybe you could give me some pointers one day. you have an awesome talent. It was a really good poem to read and even have some tears to. Later days.
~ fallingleaf1 ~ -
Great Write
its not just you that can go on about it, i go on about it quite a lot,
as for the poem this is, In My Opinion, a very good and very descriptive write, good word choice, good structure and over all, very good to read.
keep up the good work, keep the writes coming.
all the best
~Michael~
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I love this... its so creatice, and
"If you stand in the rain, I won't notice your tears
If you put on a mask, I won't see all your fears"
Brings such a vivid image.
Terrific job. Keep writing. -
hey,
Wow this is really really good I really enjoyed reading this fantstic piece. -
Sweet is all I can say.
Keep it up.
Keep writing.
God bless you. -
Great write...It took my breath away...keep it up
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mm... i always try to love people for who they are instead of who i think they should be. when you love someone for who you think they should be, they'll always disappoint you.. i like it best when i can be proud of my friends, not disappointed in them. love people for who they are... and when someone loves you for who you are, you've got one of the best friends you can have. loved this write, my friend. keep on
-m-
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good job
This is a very insightful write. I don't like mixing rhyming stanzas with unrhymed stanzas but that's just a personal preference. As far as the content, this is a very effective appeal to the emotions, and seems to work well on its own level.
Is it great poetry, no. Is it good for what it is? Yes, but it's rather awkward reading in some places. It could be polished up a bit and you'd have a better poem. I'd be curious to see the response poem. -
There's no way it's just you who can write on that subject of unsure love. I know I can, I feel it every day. So I will have to think about how exactly would reply, but you have without question found a topic I know in my heart. I could judge this is one of two ways. It doesn't look "proffessional" to me, but at the same time, I really like the randomness of the layout. Especially due to the "chorus" rhyming, I'm tempted to read all the little stanzas as rhyming, but it's ok that they don't. It's the meaning of the poem that's most important, and you have something special about that going on. Thank you for the entry.
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Spellbinding
Your poem "Would You" is beyond description --- it was breathtaking and so vividly real...God bless you for sharing it
Love,
Tom
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