Inside of me I scream,
As I think of you,
My heart will always bleed,
I hope we can meet again soon,
You maybe gone,
But i still always think of you,
When I listen to our song,
I wish I am able to see you,
I'm sorry I treated you bad,
I wish I can tell you,
How much I love you,
Not telling you before,
Makes me feel so bad,
I'm sorry I was a fool,
I wish I can turn back time,
And change how it was,
To what it should have been,
I need to cry,
I need to die,
I want to scream,
Right now I cry,
As I wait to die,
Right now I scream,
As I wait for you to come for me,
Take me away,
I miss you,
I love you.
Take me away.
As I think of you,
My heart will always bleed,
I hope we can meet again soon,
You maybe gone,
But i still always think of you,
When I listen to our song,
I wish I am able to see you,
I'm sorry I treated you bad,
I wish I can tell you,
How much I love you,
Not telling you before,
Makes me feel so bad,
I'm sorry I was a fool,
I wish I can turn back time,
And change how it was,
To what it should have been,
I need to cry,
I need to die,
I want to scream,
Right now I cry,
As I wait to die,
Right now I scream,
As I wait for you to come for me,
Take me away,
I miss you,
I love you.
Take me away.
Author notes
surrender
Written February 27th, 2005
A contest entry
- Recently, a good friend of mine decided to committ suicide. She was caught and brought to a hospital by Kechara.
300 points, ended June 22, 2006, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - GIve me the best you got- prewrites allowed by Heartbeatsxfading.
300 points, ended January 16, 2007, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - A.S.S. by brightXdarkness.
600 points, ended November 19, 2007, 29 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Prewrite Fiesta ... 30 poets by Musafir.
370 points, ended April 9, 2008, 17 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - JUST TWO DAYS TO REACH 1000 ENTRIES !!!! ( BE A PART OF THIS RECORD BREAKING CONTEST ) by Alex Hex.
300 points, ended May 1, 2008, 526 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - loosing a loved one by karas.
400 points, ended November 25, 2008, 47 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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I can relate to this but its more like a poem than a song. I really did like it tho.
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Emotional and with surrender.
Best wishes and good luck

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2-3
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wow. This was very emotional and yet I can understand each of the feelings and why you could be feeling that way. I know this was written a while ago. I just wanted to know if you are okay now. No one "needs to die." Oh, and by the way, you wrote "maybe" when it should have been "may be." That was pretty much the only typo I found. You have very good punctuation (which many of the other poems I have looked at for this contest - or in general, don't have). I just hope that you have gotten so much stronger from this situation. That's what I like to think happens anyway with things like these. You grow from them. He/she will always be with you. Thank you for entering my contest and good luck!
Alex -
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yeah. im better now. it took me a while but then i moved on. thanks for the comment=]
Brittany -
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I am VERY glad to hear
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Very nice work, hun.
Good luck in my contest!!! -
yea, the people took my comments! lol great job
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Very beautiful! it was well written and has excellent flow! i enjoyed it because it shows how much someone can love another. I encourage you to write more poems like this
You have some real talent
~Teague~ -
Yeah, I like this one, sad but so true. I love the last three lines, an excellent finish. Claire x
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Very good. Made me remember how I was before..
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This is beautiful. It really shows how someone can be heartbroken but still happy that they will see their loved ones again. Well done!
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awwww , such a sweet piece ,even though it very sad..
nicely penned
Scarlet
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think u
~psycho~ -
another great write! i really like your poetry! keep it up!
Edited on Mar 18, 2:21 p.m. because ''. -
tinky u
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OMG DIS ROCKS BRITBRAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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This is an excellent piece, very sad but very emotional. We have all made mistakes and our behavior will not always be the best, but the acts of others as a result of our actions is not "our" fault, they had a choice and made a very bad one. Never blame yourself, we are after all, human, and will fail. We only fail if we repeat the same mistake. Stand tall and proud.
1 - 18 of 18









4 old applause
