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A Fool in Love

I can't feel my hand as i hold yours
I can't tell you what i feel to make things worse
I had all the time to express my emotions
Yet i see the denial of your actions

I am a fool to fall for you
To see you so perfect as i always do
I may know of your foolishness but i close my eyes
I know teh consequences but i can't pay the price

I see you strong; when i see your teers
I see you brave; when you can't stand your fears
I see your pain; when you smile at me
I see you as a lady; when your heart is not free

Why must i fall for you
Falling each time i wish not to do
I wanted to free my heart with your memories
But a fool in love is all i can see
For i am but a fool in love

Author notes

this poem was my very first poem i ever written so its not my best piece of work i will be posting better ones shortly
Written February 20th, 2005

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 10 of 10

  • Never Fall in Love
    October 18, 2007

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    I am a fool to fall for you
    To see you so perfect as i always do

    I think I liked those lines the best even though I'm not the biggest fan of any love poetry... I still believe that your ending can use a little fixing as it felt a little jumbled to read. With that said, I'm not sure if you are a fool - love can fool a whole tons of us, though.

    All the best in the contest, good luck
    Never ♥


  • Viyanna Rosemarie silver member
    October 2, 2007

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    i would like to thank you for sharing your talent with me through this wonderful write. i wish you well in the contest that we both have entered. i am looking forward to reading more from you in the near future. viyanna rosemarie


  • Brandon Ashley
    March 10, 2007
    Edit | Reply
    thanks for writing it was a good piece

  • PalmettoSky
    February 15, 2007

    Edit | Reply
    I think it is great that you have allowed for this format in your need for self expression. I have been writing since I was your age, I find it very interesting to look back over my body of work sometimes and witness the progression that time and wisdom has brought to my writing through the years. I wish you all the best. peace always.


  • fading memories
    March 2, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    thank you beautiful that really means alot to me


  • Sarahn2boys
    February 25, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I REALLY ENJOYED THIS MY FAVORITE PART WOULD HAVE TO BE:I see you strong; when i see your teers
    I see you btave; when you can't stand your fears
    I see your pain; when you smile at me
    I see you as a lady; when your heart is not free
    SOME ^PEOPLE JUST DONT UNDERSTAND, THAT HE CAN HURT ME OVER AND OVER AGIN, BUT I AM IN LOVE, I AM BUT A FOOL IN LOVE. A FOOL IN LOVE I THINK IS SOMEBODY WHO LOVES, BUT LOVES THE WRONG PERSON OR DOEST GET LOVE BACK. I THINK THAT THIS WAS A GREAT WRITE. CONGRATS.GOD BLESS, LOVE , ANGEL


  • February 24, 2005
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    ''Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm a truly good selection that is for sure but there were a few minor errors but those don't really matter. well i reaaly like your selection. it was truly emotional. keep up the good work and good luck in the future. I am looking forward to reading more of your selections. well best of luck in the future. very good job. well bye for now. happy trails. BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE' fdgh


  • bloodlustgirl
    February 22, 2005
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    trully awesome and i wouldn't worry bout the typos cause i feel it's good to just let things flow if there are typos oh well anyway awesome write really really good stuff **autumn**

  • INFAMOUSalyssa
    February 20, 2005
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    ooh..hehe..this is really good..especially the last 2 lines..this is an AWSUME first poem. i wish my first was this good..check it for typo's though. nice job.


  • LadyOfFate
    February 20, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    it is pretty good. I suggest you use the webs spell checker, but besides that I think it is good. keep up the good work. laters

1 - 10 of 10