"You can't be superman", I thought,
As your wheelchair slowly spun around;
But the crowd ate up the words you brought.
The frustration and the pain you've fought
Made quicksand out of solid ground --
"You can't be superman", I thought.
The attention of the audience was caught,
Though you didn't exit with a bound --
The crowd ate up the words you brought.
The understanding that you sought
Relaxed you, as the night unwound --
Still, "you can't be superman", I thought.
Your gallant words won't go for naught;
We'll search until a cure is found ...
The crowd ate up the words you brought.
The lesson that your courage taught
Grows stronger with each spoken sound.
"You can't be superman", I thought;
But the crowd ate up the words you brought.
Author notes
I'm sure many people remember the terrible accident when Christopher Reeves fell from his horse and was paralyzed from the waist down. I saw him on television addressing the Democratic National Convention, and I wrote this the next day.
Obviously, this is a villanelle. A French form normally employed for nature poems, but introduced into English by Dylan Thomas who used it to write a poem to his father who was dying of cancer. The form is 19 lines, with a double rhyme scheme: ABA ABA ABA ABA ABA BABB.
e c r i v a i n 0 1
A contest entry
- "he's got sand" (true grit) by james119.
800 points, ended July 19, 2008, 6 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - HEROES AND HEROINES-poems needed for ecumenical event at Anglican venue. by Vera Rich.
700 points, ended October 22, 26 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 18 of 18
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I LOVE VILLANELLES...THEY ARE THE NEATEST FORM OF POETRY I THINK...IT WAS A WONDERFUL DEDICATION TO CHRISTOPHER REEVES...
GOOD LUCK -
This is a very telling and well-crafted piece. The repetitions of the villanelle form well suits the subject, and underpins the sense and development of the theme. Moreover, the author has the courage to introduce slight variations in the repeated lines (again, enhancing sense and development) AND the sensitiviity NOT to set out the rules of the form in the author's note - a practice which irritates me intensely, as it seems as if the poet is saying to the reader "See how clever I am, writing in such a sophisticated form", rather than "Here is my poem which I think has something meaningful to express!"
As for the subject-matter, this was right on target both for the competition and for the live show, where we used it in a context pinpointing the difference between the sci-fi cartoon heroes with their supra-human powers (which make an entertaining story, but are hardly role models for ordinary mortals to try to emulate!) and the real world in which true heroism is often a matter of rising above adversity, particularly in the service of others.
The stressing of the second line is a little difficult at first reading - one is tempted to begin with an iamb - "As YOUR wheel- and then to emend the rest of the line so that it reads
"As YOUR wheel-CHAIR spun SLOW-ly ROUND".
However, the (VERY competent and experienced) reader assigned to this poem realized that the line needs to start with an anapaest, so that "your" is unstressed - and WHEEL receives the first stress of the
line throwing the emphasis on to WHEEL ... which pinpoints the disability. So that, in fact, what at first reading seems a metrical infelicity to the UK ear in fact enhances the poem..
May I say - without detracting from the achievement of the "Gold" winner, that it was a VERY close race between you... The deciding factor was the title... which seemed rather obscure, particularly a UK audience - and remember, this competition WAS to select poems for a UK event. Moreover, although for US readers the fact that he was addressing a particular political Convention may have considerable significance - for us (and indeed, for the purpose of the poem) party politics seem hardly relevant...as far as the poem is concerned he could have been addressing, say, the audience at a concert to raise funds for disability-related research.
Do think about this!
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I took another look at this ...
and decided that you are correct, so, even though this is a published poem, I've changed the title to "Christopher Reeve, A Will Of Steel."
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Five stars
This poem is very well written. I like the style it is written in, and appreciate the difficulty in writing a poem like this and captivating the essence of what you are trying to say flow comprehensively. Truly Christopher Reeves was a hero and champion for his cause, and his and his wifes efforts have led to promising developments in the cause for spinal cord injuries, paralysis, and stem cell research. Although I didn't hear his address in it's entirety, I remember hearing sound bites of it on news shows, and hearing and reading of his efforts As indicated above, the poem is very well written in the style that you have chosen to write it in, I flows, well, and the message is obvious. I cannot offer any ideas on improving the poem. I believe that each poem is a personal expression of what the writer feels am always reluctant to critique or censor another poets work.
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Your form is inspiring, and the Hero in the poem is well known to us, I watched much of his plight on the TV so you did him justice here. I think he would have loved your tribute; as I did.
Since that day we know he became one of the pioneers (A Superman of sorts,)of DNA,
how powerful and memorable was that?
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Well, we know ....
that stem-cell research could eventually cure conditions like his, but the rightwing will fight it their last breath. I have a good friend whose son is a quad so I know all too well what a hell it can be. The poor woman has had such a hard life anyway, so it's doubly unfortunate for her.
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While not so familiar with form poetry, I enjoy this.
The idea of a person playing a hero actually becoming one, albeit in a very different sense, is thought provoking. -
Wow this is absolutely breathtaking. I definately was not expecting this, but i am absolutely blown away. I agree with this entire poem, it really relates to my topic of contest. As for the rhyme and style, it is fantastic. I could not be able to pull this off!!!! And you did, so elegantly.
I also love the repetition with,
"You cant be superman"
It further stresses the subject of what is a hero.
Fantastic Write, thanks for entering. Good Luck.
***Sarah xxx -
The reason I've never taken these on is that I could never do it like this. The repetition would slay me. I just can't believe you made it work so well. The rhyme is seamless. If I tryed this I would sound like some third grader with a message about how many ducks he could pluck. I don't even need to tell you I felt the message. As an aside you may be intrested in the one above this for voices for Africa.
Peace,Rob -
good job, he truly is a hero.
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Bravo!
Christopher Reeve truly became a super man as he gallantly triumphed all of his adversities...his courage and determination are sources of great inspiration for me and I thank you so much for writing this -
Such an inspiring man... with such a beautifully sad story... I was heartbroken when "superman" passed away... He fought so hard for his cause... this expresses that fact very well... So yes, nice work, which was well received... I'm sure any reader could feel connected to this.
~Andrew -
thoughtful, well researched, original, touching...
a v good write, especially as this subject clearly affects u.
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this is very cool and inspirational. you really did a good job portraying your feelings on the topic. Keep up the great work!
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A worthy gold medal indeed. Villanelles are brutally difficult to write in any fashion that doesn't sound ridiculous. Yet you pulled it off magnificantly, and deservingly were rewarded. I remember the event described, and you captured that moment too in the form you chose.
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While I'm not generally a fan of the form you chose- the execution is flawless. I can't write these (which may be why I don't care for them!) So- good work on the form.
The content, I completely understand, after seeing Reeve's speak on several tv shows. It's kind of sad- the state of our nation. We don't do anything until someone famous is involved. Interesting read, thanks for posting. -
Kudos for presenting this in the form you have chosen, and still pumping it full of impact. This was one of those things that rocked the people everywhere, the seemingly unjust nature of it all. And I loved the message in this...for all he was no longer Superman, he was still a super man. I have seen a few doco's on him, and each time I found he had the capacity to move. Best of luck, and thank you for entering.
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I do wish I could write villanelles. This read perfectly, and I am sure it catches what many people must have felt following Christopher Reeve's accident and the battles he fought subsequently.
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