Spent hours driving fast out in the rain.
It failed to wash away or leave behind the pain.
All the water falling from the midnight skies
couldn't hide the water falling from my eyes.
I thought you knew me;
I thought you understood my soul.
But, all you did was see
something less than all my whole.
So I spent hours tonight out in the rain.
My eyes are aching from the pain.
I stare straight up into the stormy skies,
and wonder if the storms are all just in my eyes.
Author notes
Just how I spent my night. Not that it really matters or anything.
Written February 16th, 2005
What did you think
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Wow
This is deep and full of emotion. It is very good. You have written this one well. I hope all is well with you. I hope to hear from you soon.
God bless you,
Tabitha -
emotional
awwwww..... so touching I have tears welling in my eye's. those time's shall past. Your work has a very nice stucture, alittle brief, but get's your feeling across and has very touching meaning.
Thank you for shareing
@}~~`~~B -
I have been down this road.The pain can be unbearable sometimes.very good emotion in this piece...i like the show of emotion.One thing...you may want to go with a lighter color for it makes it a little hard to read.
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good job! i really felt the emotion!
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for the most, i like this piece. . .the duality of the rain outside the vehicle and the rain inside. . .is brilliant, but i did stumble with the middle verse a bit, something about it didn't quite strike with me, wish i could describe my thought better on that. anyway, good job otherwise.
-tony -
definatly a emotion packed poem. and as for the not being able to write lately, perhaps the best stimuli to writing is emotion, and the most powerfully moving i would hv to say is pain/heart break. my fav lines are by far "I stare straight up into the stormy skies,and wonder if the storms are all just in my eyes." thy just really stick out to me, and i think i connect with the best, after what hppnd with me and the one i love. well great write, and good den to thee
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Ok yeah sometimes it takes having your life smashed against the brick wall of reality to gget the pen flowing.
those were 4 powerful lines you penned. The rest of them came together nicely as well.
I hope tonight finds clearer sailing.
Susan -
Thanks a lot, Drew. I've been around. I just have only posted a few things in recent times. I haven't had much coming to me in the way of words for a while, but it's interesting how just the right mood or circumstance or whatever hits you and you can literally just sit down and write something. Anyway, I am glad you liked it. I actually was thinking of the words while I drove around in the rain last night, the first four lines, then when I got home, I wrote them out about 30 minutes later, then added a little bit, and there you go. Thanks for the comment and for stopping by. Take care.
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This was a marvel to read. I haven't seen you online in forever. Where ya been?
The last paragraph really stuck out to me..
Thanks!
~Drew
1 - 9 of 9






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