But I hate myself now and I know
He is a cunt and I'd like to kill him
Oh christ let me be dead
So I dont have to look at my ugly face in the mirror
Except that this is just a joke
So thanks to everyone who sympathised.
My dad fucked me for years and I liked it
But I hate myself now and I know
He is a cunt and I'd like to kill him
Oh christ let me be dead
So I dont have to look at my ugly face in the mirror
Except that this is just a joke
So thanks to everyone who sympathised.
But I hate myself now and I know
He is a cunt and I'd like to kill him
Oh christ let me be dead
So I dont have to look at my ugly face in the mirror
Except that this is just a joke
So thanks to everyone who sympathised.
Author notes
This poem was originally written as an experiment and posted here under the challenging pseudonym "Wristslasher" WITHOUT the last two lines to see what sort of reaction it would get. A few people wrote sympathetically and gave well-meaning advice, having been convinced it was true. One particular person kindly wrote to call me ugly, a dickhead, stupid and friendless, suggesting my acne-covered face was no doubt a cause of my unpopularity. Ain't that nice?
As for the poem, it is really very badly written: no scansion that you'd notice, in fact it bears no resemblance to poetry at all. But I am proud of it. Please applaud it.
I have written several other intentionally bad poems (and a few unintentionally bad ones, before anyone comments); so try
www.allpoetry.com/poem/1124963 The World's Worst Love Poem ;
www.allpoetry.com/poem/1124998 The Worst Gay Poem ;
www.allpoetry.com/poem/1424339 Teenage Girls Are Tits .
Written February 8th, 2005
In a list
A contest entry
- Hand me your worst! by Mj.
300 points, ended April 11, 2005, 12 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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You jokester you. My feelings were at first relief, that i'm not the only one, but now I think you're a sick little duke.
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Ha Ha
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Lol i just had to laugh when i got to the end of this. This is a seriously sick joke that you worked to your advantage.
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I can see why you're called "nerdy".
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hm yeah i don't really like this. it's not that great to joke about stuff like that, and this isn't really that much of a joke. it's like, rude sarcasm. i didn't really like any of the language in it, either. except it was in a poem for the worst poem, so i guess it's supposed to be bad. so good job in being bad? haha i donno.
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I'm so glad that is was a joke. I thought that part was a bit humorous.
Safely hidden in the darkness,
~ The Rocker who lost all aka Sacred Shadows -
I am honoured to have been awarded the GOLD cup for this appalling effort. Thank you to all my detractors.
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Dear True Love Gal: I have to disagree with you. I think this is a truly badly written poem. In fact it has no poetic merit whatsoever. I should know because I am the poet and I know how little poetic thought I gave it. With heartfelt poetic wishes. Edna.
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I don't know how you won on this, it was not a bad poem, it was not poorly written it was just a little sick. Way to go though
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I love sick humor. But I won't applaud it because incest just isn't funny.
Just kidding. I won't applaud it because I'm stingy and disgruntled.
~*~Kat C~*~ -
Seriously, when I first posted this, people sent me IMs asking me not to kill myself and someone else suggested the problem lay with my acne-covered face. I loved all of this since I am a happy 50-year old non-acne bunny! It shows you what a load of C@NTS people are!!!!!!!!!!!! GO ON, GIVE US AN APPLAUSE, YOU KNOW U WANT TO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Edited on Mar 17, 5:37 p.m. because ''. -
Oh man...thank god this is a joke...Sweet Artificial Jesus! This poem still had a lot of feeling in it up until the last two lines though, so I don't know if it is among the ranks of the worst I've ever read, but I understand that it takes a lot of effort for a good poet like yourself (or me
) to dumb down a great deal, so good job.
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Well Edna it is a joke yes..filled with dry humor...and that I give you a happy guy..but I must remove it from the contest..it doesn't relate to the contest you submitted it to. I do want to Thank you for entering and will look forward to reading more of your cheeky
work again. 
Edited on Mar 15, 1:43 because ''. -
It wasn't poetry. It was a sick joke. But so is most poetry.
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Im sorry but i failed to see this as poetry, the language really threw me off, sorry, keep on writing.
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Daddy is a boy's best friend sometimes.
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This is short and sweet. My dad fucked me and i liked it too. When i look at my face in a mirror, it regularly morphs into the contorted face of my grunting, orgasming father. I slit my wrists regularly at such moments as i masturbate in a paroxysm of guilt, disgust, hate and pleasure. Cheery o.
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