Norton the gay pink toad lay on his lily leaf in the pond in the swamp and glanced over at his lover Vladimir, the bisexual one-winged sparrow, who looked so peaceful and deformed lying there snoring in a avian-sort-of-way, And yet he knew it had to end - inter-species love was forbidden and Fat Frederick the Fairy Queen had lost his cool when he found out - even Squibbles the Dirty Dragonfly had not been very sophisticated about it, indeed he screamed for three hours - and, worst of all, those two vicious ratbags had evidently told Hankerstein the goat who had been very angry and had sneaked on him to the Supreme Council of Fairyland's wizards - now Norton would never retain his true form again.
Norton tipped the lily leaf and Vladimir fell off into the water - it was better than way - he or she was fast asleep and would never know anything about it - better to drown than die of a broken heart Norton thought wisely and caringly.
Norton hopped through the jungle toadily and pinkly - his first port of call was Squibbles' den and Norton was shocked to find that sophisticated dragonfly was not so sophisticated after all seeing what he was doing with Billy the Bumblebee (he who put the bum in bumblebee indeed). So Norton performed an act of wizardry and mercy and turned them into goldfish (as you might suspect this was Norton's preferred lunchtime snack) - now only Hankerstein remained.
- And what do you want you pink fairy freak? snapped Hankerstein angrily.
- Alakazam! cried Norton transforming Hankerstein into a green lady toad of wondrous beauty
- Take that look off your face - if you were the very last toad in the swamp I wouldn't kiss you! snapped Hankerstein the wondrous green lady angry toad.
And so it came to pass Norton was transformed with love and desire for Hankerstein but Hankerstein remained cold and aloof - Vladimir had had his/her shortcomings but at least (s)he was loving when she was awake - Norton knew he was condemned to all eternity as a tragic toad.
Postscript (for you all to sing naked in the bath)
"sparkle sparkle little toad
lying squashed upon the road
how I wonder who you are
struck down by a passing car"
Author notes
There's another nice Edna story at www.allpoetry.com/poem/1466859 .
Written February 3rd, 2005
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-
You
sing
merry
upon toad
and for the fate
of gay magicals
Oh how we wish away
with wit pains unrequited.
A Fibonacci and again smoosh. Janet -
I would like to thank you for giving me a prize in your Norton contest! Both Norton and I appreciate it. I have to say that Hankerstein is VERY VERY annoyed about the whole thing as he had a large wager on someone else. Never mind. Thanks again!
Edited on Mar 02, 5:20 p.m. because ''. -
dear commentators.....
pleased you liked it - please note that the 2 couplets in the "author's comments" box are a sort of epilogue to the whole tale - Norton's eternal suffering was ended by a vehicular mishap which is how it should be in a fairy tale.
Edited on Feb 04, 7:30 because 'punctuation is g-o-o-d'. -
hahaha i like it alot. This was an interesting twist on the Norton-ness I was expecting. I noticed you used all the adjectives in caps....very nice touch. I like the end, it was random...very nice...good luck in the contest!
XoXo
NiKKi -
I love it! Muah ha ha ha! A pink toad, huh? How long did it take you to write this? I have to wonder. It's an amazing piece of work with all it's humor. I don't know what you're supposed to do but it's great what you did and I don't know if the contest is over but you get a gold in my book. 
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