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Four Weeks

I'm tired and cold
I can't sleep
Many things went through
His head this week
One of those things
Broke my heart
He said it would be easier
If we were apart
His head, he said
Was struggling to cope
With me, said he
There was no hope
I'm tired and cold
I've lost my dreams
I've got to give him some time
It seems

Author notes

Written on 25th February 2001 for someone I just broke up with.

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • Soulful Woman silver member
    December 9, 2006
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    It is so awful when we lose someone we love. I can feel the pain you were experiencing..We do survive it although at the time we feel we wont...Im glad it has been some time since you wrote this and I hope you are past the pain. Thank you for sharing a piece of your heart.
    Soulful Woman


  • apoeticinjustice gold member
    December 8, 2006

    Edit | Reply
    it's always difficult to cope with a breakup. A good piece. I couldn't feel the emotions as strong as I would have liked, but then, perhaps that's the way it was...a dull realization vs an outpouring of emotion. Regardless, it depicts something that most, if not all of us encounter in life. Well done.
    Rory

  • atty-poet
    December 6, 2006
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    Short and bittersweet, but a little too much "tell" and not enough "show". Show how it hurts, rather than just tell us it hurts. I thought the title was intriguing at first, but not sure how it relates to the poem.


    • DefinitiveFreak silver member
      December 6, 2006
      Edit | Reply
      The title does relate to the poem. It's the amount of time that particular guy said he needed. Thanx for commenting.


  • Jeremy0826 silver member
    May 18, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    This is a sad but honest write. It's so difficult loving someone when they have given up hope and don't care to be in your life anymore. Great write and thanks for sharing it!

    Allen0826


  • KrystleCahill
    January 27, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    oh i loved it, its so beautiful and so full of love and romance. You have a great gift of words keep writting and don't let anyone pull you down

  • SebeliusTurner
    October 14, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    That hurts. One of my close friends is going through the same thing at the moment. I liked the way you repeated at the end. Keep writing.

    Good luck in the Contest


  • le Chaton
    April 12, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    I can totally relate to this. Some of my sad love poetry is about the same person who said these same things, long ago. Thank you for sharing this for my contest... it was beautifully written from the heart.

    SK


  • kimmyb
    October 4, 2002
    Edit | Reply

    don't touch it!

    for anyone who's ever been there this hurts,short and to the point well written

1 - 9 of 9